Padraig writes: "Madeleine McCann is a young British girl who was abducted several months ago, and her story has produced mass media hysteria. They've hit an all time low today.
Both the Observer and the Mirror, huge UK newspapers, are reporting that an ex policeman called Danie Krugel has found DNA traces of her on a beach.
What they don't tell you is that in fact, Krugel has a magic box which works on a "secret energy source" using "quantum physics" to pinpoint the location of a missing person anywhere in the world on a map simply by using a sample of their DNA.
This has got to be the most inaccurate story of the year. Playing on people's hopes like that is just wrong."
I am here by the will of the people and I won't leave until I get my raincoat
- a slogan of the anarchists in Richard Kadrey's "Metrophage"