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Goldman Sachs Raising Funds to Buy Celsius Assets (coindesk.com) 24

Goldman Sachs is looking to raise $2 billion from investors to buy up distressed assets from troubled crypto lender Celsius, according to two people familiar with the matter. CoinDesk reports: The proposed deal would allow investors to buy up Celsius' assets at potentially big discounts in the event of a bankruptcy filing, the people said. Goldman Sachs appears to be gauging interest and soliciting commitments from Web3 crypto funds, funds specializing in distressed assets and traditional financial institutions with ample cash on hand, according to a person familiar with the situation. The assets, most likely cryptocurrencies having to be sold on the cheap, would then likely be managed by participants in the fundraising push. Celsius has tapped restructuring advisory firm Alvarez & Marsal, the Wall Street Journal reported Friday afternoon. Earlier this month, Celsius abruptly paused withdrawals, swaps, and transfers between accounts, citing "extreme market conditions." The disclosure sent bitcoin's price below $20,000 and prompted the firm's token to take a 60% tumble.

As of Monday, the company said it's still working on "stabilizing [their] liquidity and operations."
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Goldman Sachs Raising Funds to Buy Celsius Assets

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  • by bsdetector101 ( 6345122 ) on Friday June 24, 2022 @09:10PM (#62649070)
    Crypto is nothing, Bitcoin is nothing but hype ! It's not an asset !
  • by rsilvergun ( 571051 ) on Friday June 24, 2022 @09:15PM (#62649078)
    Goldman Sachs basically runs the American economy. They're the ones who survived the 2008 market crash and they did it largely due to their tight integration with our Treasury department.

    Crypto is a pretend asset. Unlike houses there's no real value there. If we start letting major players like Goldman Sachs dabbling in crypto they will eventually create a bubble with it.

    And when that bubble pops every single one of us is going to get screwed. Half of us will be laid off to increase stock prices and the other half will be forced to work double shifts of unpaid overtime.

    Seriously we need to start electing people who will stop this kind of thing. Otherwise say goodbye to your retirement and I hope you like cat food
    • Re: (Score:3, Informative)

      by Anonymous Coward
      They aren't trying to buy crypto assets, they are trying to buy the loan contracts at a discount. They are high risk but if bought at a reasonable price they are definitely a worthwhile purchase.
      • There's still no there there. Goldman Sachs knows that and they'll be planning to do one of two things. Other immediately offload those high risk loans to a pension fund run by a corrupt appointment or they're going to get a whole bunch of them bundle them together into a security and sell that as though it were valuable. Just like they did with mortgages that were underwater.

        Either way this is them looking for a worthless asset that they can trick suckers into buying and create a massive bubble with. I
      • They (GS) aren't trying to buy anything.

        From TFA: "looking to raise $2 billion from investors to buy up distressed assets"

        Never gamble with your own money when you can gamble with somebody else's. Rule of Acquisition 24a

  • by linuxguy ( 98493 ) on Friday June 24, 2022 @09:20PM (#62649090) Homepage
    Sometimes people think that big companies don't big mistakes. I personally think that bigger ones make bigger mistakes. I worked 7 years for a fortune 50 company and it was very frustrating to see management make many billion dollar blunders buying up companies that later turned out to be complete duds. I don't think my company made a single successful acquisition the entire time I was there. Their main product has kept them solvent.

    I wish Goldman luck with this investment. They're going to need it.
    • You must have worked at GE too!

    • To catch a falling knife, watch who's concentrating on catching it, then kick him in the balls right as he's carefully snatching it. He will be distracted to not see it coming, and when he doubles over you can simply pick up the knife.

      Bonus points if he also cuts his hand up badly in the process.

    • They're not really doing that though. Catching a falling knife would be investing in Celsius. Goldman Sachs are just vultures waiting to feed, which to be fair is, like debt collection unpleasant but someone has to do it.

  • Two dollars.

    But only if I get to have the current portfolio of the office snack machine too.

  • that Celsius has always been a scam
  • This is probably just a desperate pump-attempt. It is highly doubtful Goldman&Sachs would be _this_ stupid.

    • Wanna bet? If there's profit to be made, Goldman Sachs have already shown us they're ready & willing to wreck national economies to do so, e.g. the Greek economy & the 2007-8 financial crisis. I guess it depends on what your definition of stupid is; Why would anyone knowingly & willingly wreck a national economy? (Tip: focus on the real-world human costs rather than the abstract numbers from official statistics.)
      • by gweihir ( 88907 )

        You have to take into account that G&S has to declare this as high-risk investment and cannot use any of it as reserves. That would make this hugely expensive for them. They are a bank and regulated, after all. And it may turn out that they actually have to shut down Celsius if they buy it, because suddenly, if they are not very, very careful, Celsius could be subject to regulation as a bank as well. No, I think this is just some crypto bros trying to make a profit by planting a false story.

        • You know that Glass-Steagall (1932) or anything similar hasn't been reinstated since the 2007-8 crash, right? Check the Gramm–Leach–Bliley Act, which formally enshrined into law the conditions that, along with regulatory capture by the banks, have led to economic instability that we've been seeing since 1999. Nothing changed after 2008. We're still in the financial crisis. Buckle up, it ain't over yet.
  • Goldman Sachs is looking to raise $2 billion from (greater fools) investors.

    Why does it not surprise me to find that the vampire squid is involved in this?

Intel CPUs are not defective, they just act that way. -- Henry Spencer

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