Breaking Gender Cliques at Work?

An anonymous reader asks: "No-one likes finding themselves being the 'odd one out' of a clique, and gender barriers make them harder to break. The question is simple: what can a girl in IT do when she finds herself on the outside of those cliques of boy coworkers? Or inversely, what should groups of boys at work be doing to be more welcoming for that lone girl in the IT office?"

Bring in unisex bathrooms...

[GillBates0]

...nothing breaks down barriers like hearing someone from the opposite gender breaking wind.

Best bet

[techpawn]

Get the guys castrated so they don't wet themselves and yell "OMG B00bIES!"

nudge nudge

[gEvil (beta)]

I'd suggest throwing out random Monty Python quotes. The best one for this would be walking up to the guys and saying, "Nudge nudge, wink wink, know what I mean, know what I mean, say no more..."

Conundrum...

[argStyopa]

The question is simple: what can a girl in IT do when she finds herself on the outside of those cliques of boy coworkers?

Your male coworkers know that "shag the boss" (double points if she's a woman too), or "occasionally go topless" would actually be good tips, but their value is probably lost in the blazing glare of stereotype-validation. (shrug)

I've got it.

[Spazntwich]

Cut off your hair and tape down your boobs. For supplemental camoflage, try quoting the simpsons, family guy, and various slashdot cliches.

They'll mistake you for one of their own and no longer be incapable of making eye contact or simple conversation with you.

Best bet: a good joke

[spun]

I suggest breaking the ice with a good joke, like:
Q.) What's the definition of a macho man?
A.) Someone who shaves his balls with a weed wacker

or for the opposite gender:

Q.) What's the definition of a macho woman?
A1.) She suck-starts her Harley.
A2.) She kick-starts her vibrator.
A3.) She rolls her own tampons.

or my personal favorite, always a hit with a ladies:
Q.) How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A.) (preferably delivered interupting the other party) That's not funny!

These jokes are gauranteed to make an impression on the opposite sex.

IT chicks should dress like anime characters

[Anonymous Coward]

and boys should bathe once a week, even if they don't need it, to welcome the IT chick.

Lunch...

[__aaclcg7560]

I had woman co-worker who insisted everyone goes out to lunch and sit together at the same time. That was cool. After she left for a job closer to home, everyone went back to their old ways.

Re:Hahaha...

[onion2k]

Who hasn't sat through sexual harrassment training

I haven't. But I'm getting better with practise.

Wow, have we fallen so far?

[Colin Smith]

Don't take up golf just to get in the mix if you're not an athelete.

Golf... Athlete?

 

Re:There isn't enough karma on /.

[Blakey Rat]

Ok, I understand that Golf isn't exactly, say, marathon running. But you get more exercise COOKING? What do you, cook on a treadmill? Buy 50-lb bags of sugar and flour and lift them repeatedly? Chase after the pigs and cows you're going to eat personally?

Re:Hahaha...

[Bamafan77]

"We all wanted to invite her out with us after work, not JUST because we were trying to score with her, but because we wanted her to be part of the team."

Fixed that. :)

"We never invited her, because we were all worried about sexual harrassment."

Sounds a lot better than "none of us had any balls". :)

Re:Ease Off Trying To Date Her

[eaddict]

This reminded me of a comment when I first started working where I work ow. I would almost always do lunch with the same woman (let's call her Anne). Finally, a co-worker worked up the nerve in the elevator and said "People are starting to talk about you and Anne. You guys are always doing lunch out of the building together." Without missing a beat I said "And I already have a key to her place!" Thier jaw dropped but after the awkward pause I said "She is my sister-in-law." We just happened to work on the same floor of the same building.

Re:Ease Off Trying To Date Her

[TheGratefulNet]

Personally, I'm still working on getting my social skills *up to* that level.

oh, man! you mean there are levels?

what was the part about boobs, again, though?

Re:Best bet: a good joke

[flosofl]

Q.) How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Everyone knows it's two.

One to screw it in, and one to tell her how much better than a man she did it.
*rimshot*

Re:technology, video games, military hardware

[Tackhead]

> I F**ING HATE people being able to talk only about cool technology, fun video games, military hardware, or the latest in high horsepower vehicles regardless of their gender. I'd better quit my job if I had to spend over 33% of my life surrounded with these assholes.

Then what in the ring-tailed rambling fuck are you doing here on Slashdot? If it doesn't run Linux, go "beep", "bang", or "vroom", we're not interested in it.

> Additional information: I'm male, software engineer.

Every engineer should have a wife and a mistress. He can tell his wife he's spending the night with his mistress, and tell his mistress he's spending the night with his wife, and finally have enough peace and quiet to get back into the lab and get some fracking work done!

Re:Hahaha...

[ArsonSmith]

What if you're all going out to have group sex?

just act like one of the guys.....

[jp_fielding]

and take off your shirt.

Re:There isn't enough karma on /.

[crabpeople]

"As Batman said, find some common interests with your coworkers"

Um what movie was that in?
Batman in a batman original: 'BATMAN: The behind a desk years'

Watch in horor as he battles the deadly stacks of TPS reports..
Marvel at his ingenuity as he uses smoke bombs to evade customer inquries!
Feel his pain at having to refill the water cooler... again...

Comming soon! from the makers of 'BATMAN: Batman builds a deck' and 'BATMAN: Journey to the bottom of a case of beer'

The PC solution

[Hoi Polloi]

According to Ms Magazine, nothing breaks the ice for a woman at work like wearing a halter top, an ass tat, and short-shorts.

Re:This makes it all clear!

[jb.hl.com]

Then you're far too mature for Slashdot.

Re:Hahaha...

[drsquare]

He was immediately reprimanded and was forced to go to sensitivity training.

Sensitivity training = being paid to do nothing. You don't need to force someone to do that.

Re:Wow, have we fallen so far?

[Anonymous Coward]

Don't take up golf just to get in the mix if you're not an athelete.

Golf... Athlete?


Golf = Slashdot Athlete

Re:Hahaha...

[Tackhead]

> I've seen suggestions about "being friendly", bringing cookies, organizing events - as a woman, I'd be nervous that some of these actions might be taken the wrong way. I've beaten off clueless geeks once or twice before, and I haven't found a good way to do it.

Lawsuit-inspiring tip: If you're using cookies, you're doing it all wrong. Crumbs chafe.

Re:The PC solution

[mfrank]

I don't think you're taking into account the Rosie O'Donnell possibility.

Re:Hahaha...

[ZB Mowrey]

I've beaten off clueless geeks once or twice before, and I haven't found a good way to do it. Plenty of lube and a solid pair of safety glasses might be a good start.* *You asked for it, and damn am I glad we don't work together. That would surely have gotten me reprimanded.

Re:just act like one of the guys.....

[soft_guy]

and take off your shirt.

yeah, since it is the IT department, you won't even have the biggest boobs.

Re:Best bet: a good joke

[ToasterofDOOM]

Naw, you all have it wrong. How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, feminists can't change anything.

Re:Best bet: a good joke

[Neop2Lemus]

Two. One to change the lightbulb and one to suck my dick.

But I light your answer as well, I hadn't heard that one:-)

Re:Best bet: a good joke

[Elemenope]

Well, only a woman can understand how the light socket is feeling and empathize. All guys know is the bulb, and the bulb knows no feelings.

Ducks.

(Quack!)

Oh this was too easy...

[Anonymous Coward]

>I've beaten off clueless geeks once or twice before, and I haven't found a good way to do it.

Slowly, with baby oil.

BWAHAHAHAHhahahahaha couldn't resist.

Re:Hahaha...

[PylonHead]

OJ Simpson was investigated, tried, and ultimately acquitted of being a murderer. Yet how many people still think he did it?

Isn't that different?

I mean... he did do it...

Re:Best bet: a good joke

[jayegirl]

If you're going to quote The Young Ones, get it right:

"This calls for a very special blend of psychology and extreme violence."

Re:The PC solution

[Anonymous Coward]

Ummm, no, I'm pretty sure Rosie would like seeing that too.

I am no troll.

[Zero_Independent]

I say Bullshit. You don't want to be accused of sexual harrasment? More like you're afraid of the embarassment of being rejected. Grow a fucking pair. Everybody's telling you don't do this, don't do that. And you obey. You listen. Is it making you happy?

I say fuck that. I say I do whatever I feel like, whenever I feel like it, all the time. You gonna get fired if you hit on some hot blonde? They gonna ostracize you? You gonna be disappeared? Instead of you being afraid of everyone, they should be afraid of you.

As for you lone IT girl.

Are you hot? Didn't think so. You're of no use to me or anyone else. "Please help me everyone! I don't know how to make friends." You're pathetic. If you did a little exercise, and dyed your hair blonde maybe people would notice you. But you can't. That's why you are who you are. But hey, these people that you want to be friends with, they're probably assholes anyway. Don't sweat it.

Re:Best bet: a good joke

[Anonymous Coward]

Dude, he said feminists not lesbians!!1

To-may-to, to-mah-to...

Happy Hour

[e54748s]

Or really just Drinking. Simple.