Microsoft's Not So Happy Family

D.A. Zollinger writes "Reports from Redmond are that Microsoft Employees are not happy with the double delay of Windows and Office being pushed back into 2007. EETimes is reporting that some Microsoft employees are calling for the termination of several top managers Including Brian Valentine, Jim Allchin, and Steve Ballmer for the delay debacle. The report references a blog by Who da'Punk, an anonymous Microsoft employee who asks, where's the accountability for failure? So far the blog entry has generated over 350 comments from Microsoft insiders and outsiders."

Headless chicken

[LiquidCoooled]

Not a good day to be a fly on the wall in Ballmers office.

"I'm going to fucking kill Microsoft!"
HURL!
THUD!
SPLAT!

Actually though, chopping the head off the chicken might seem like a good idea at the time until you realise its the arsehole that becomes the new leader.

Re:Headless chicken

[justsomebody]

Not a good day to be a fly on the wall in Ballmers office.

???

Or did you mean, funny day to be a fly on the wall in Ballmers office, but bad day to be a chair?

Ballmer Replies!

[zaguar]

In other news, Steve Ballmer vowed to "fucking kill" all anonymous Microsoft employees.

"I've done it before and I'll do it again," he said. "Anonymity has no place at Microsoft."

Make no mistake

[OpenSourced]

Who da'Punk is in fact the real enemy. He wants to end the bloat at Microsoft and convert it into a lean and mean machine of productivity. Imagine what options open source would have if people in Microsoft where devoted to create great software for the users, instead of pursuing their own petty concerns in the corporate ladder. If Who da'Punk and others like him had their way, Microsoft would be user-centric, but keeping the users always within the Microsoft universe. He's planning a world of happy slaves of Microsoft. Now we are all slaves, but at least not happy. In the unsatisfaction of slaves the seeds of change lay. If everybody was contented, the chances of breaking the Microsoft monopoly would be nil (on the other side, we'd be happier and have great software, but still slaves).

So help him not. Cheer Balmer instead. He's our real ally in this fight.

Re:Headless chicken

[geminidomino]

Or did you mean, funny day to be a fly on the wall in Ballmers office, but bad day to be a chair?

What do you think the fly is going to get hit with?

This just in...

[SetupWeasel]

Microsoft is filling some recently vacated positions. The time to send your resume is now.

Re:Headless chicken

[KiloByte]

>Or did you mean, funny day to be a fly on the wall in Ballmers office, but bad day to be a chair?
What do you think the fly is going to get hit with?

You see, I've once killed a mosquito with an overhead swing of an axe. I'm a clumsy oaf, but so far my accuracy with axes against insects is 100% (1/1). Now, considering that the smallest throwable thing in an office is a lot wider than an axe's blade, I believe that Ballmer can make it.
His office is pretty big, so he has at least as many tries as he has chairs.

Only on thing for it

[Elitist_Phoenix]

There is one thing that will get Microsoft's employee's moral back up, a Chair-Throwing-Monkey-Dance! I'm sure they'll be able to find someone who can supply.

Re:Headless chicken

[Anonymous Coward]

From what I understand, his office is only twice as big as any of the other employees. It's just two regular offices with the wall torn out.

Now as for who tore the wall out and what sort of chair was used in that process, I haven't the slightest idea.

Re:Shareholders

[BeerCat]

And it might be seen as motivational.

Yeah, right. Motivational as in "all leave is cancelled until morale improves", or "we'll keep firing people until you ship product"

Unless it's all part of the Linux master plan...

Terminate?

[dascandy]

some Microsoft employees are calling for the termination of several top managers

Doesn't that qualify as a death threat?

Re: Bad Engineers

[Anonymous Coward]

And your name is actually Rebecca? Wow, I'm in love... oh.

Re:Headless chicken

[Antique Geekmeister]

If Ballmer could hit his targets, he wouldn't be in this fix.

Re:Headless chicken

[Anonymous Coward]

Sounds to me like Microsoft is one of the safer places to be, if you're a bug.

If you could get rid of bugs by throwing chairs at them, Ballmer could have shipped Vista years ago.

Re:Now that's just silly

[Ex Machina]

I'd challenge someone to find any application with more needless bloat than MS Office.

Azareus.

Re:How much process is too much?

[cantalpii]

They aren't cowboys in Brokeback mountain: they look after sheep. In Europe we call that shepherds :-) They're also not gay, but bisexual, so it's the bisexual shepherd movie (has a nice ring that).

Microspeak?

[Stiletto]

From the article:
With the convergence of high-tech media, this holiday season would have been an explosive nodal point to get Vista out for a compounded effect.

This is why MS can't seem to get it done. They have people working there who ACTUALLY talk like this! I mean, seriously, can anyone translate that sentence into English, please?

Re:Where Future?

[g0at]

All these years we've been giving MS monopoly rent for OS software in the belief that we were paying for an exciting future

Heh, speak for yourself!

-b

Re: Bad Engineers

[happyemoticon]

So what you're saying... is that Ballmer is an angry Klingon? Thanks, that makes his actions make so much more sense.

He's French

[tkrotchko]

"He's soave"

I assure you he is French, not Italian.

Advertising will be horrid

[igb]

Why can I be sure the advertisiing will be good? Look at the `dinosaur' campaign. It insults 40% of the customer base, tells them that the product MS sold them a few years ago is shit, is incomprehensiblem frightens children and achieves nothing. Have you met _anyone_ who's done a 97->2003 migration in the wake of it? I can see MS trying something similar for Vista: attempting to hide the lack of worthwhile new features behind a welter of abuse against its own products. ``Buy the 2006 BMW because the 2005 model will eat your children'' is bad advertising.

ian

Re: Bad Engineers

[mrchaotica]

No, Klingons have honor.

Re:MiniMSFT is a punk coward

[njh]

Doing the former would require that he attach his name to his complaints

And you're Don Giovanni. And I'm the Magic Flute.

Re:It's unfortunate

[TekPolitik]

Assuming that is true, then probably the only way for Microsoft to move forward and still maintain backwards compatibility with old code is to do what Apple did: Ditch the OS, start fresh with a new one...

Ah ha! Microsoft will finally be forced to embrace Wine!

Re:Now that's just silly

[Bacon Bits]

Azareus. (sic)

That's not needless bloat. That's Java!