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Journal Trolling4Dollars's Journal: Your Favorite Personalized Curse 30

DISCLAIMER: If you find profanity offensive, move along.

This is kind of a fill in poll. This morning when I was headed into work, some asshole cut me off and I went into one of my Tube Bar text strings:

"Why you motherfucker cock sucker! Ya yellow rat bastard! You'd fuck your own mother for a nickle you sonuvabitch"!

That always has the effect of putting a smile on my face.

Anyway I started thinking about me and some of my friends and how we actually all have personal curses that we use when we get REALLY pissed off. Back in high school one of my friends had a few choice ones:

2. Ohhh..... COCK!!! (Usually said in a rage with a fairly lengthy pause between both words)
3. What a ball jockey!

Recently another friend of mine came up with one he was particularly happy with:

1. Why that god-cocking mother... (Again said in a rage)

He also has this one:

1. God Mutha.... (Said with a strained voice. Interestingly it's not really a curse per se...)

Still another friend has:

1. What a bunch of asscocks!

Myself, I've got:

1. Mudra Fakah! (Must roll the R)
2. That's just nadtacular! (Said in a mild rage)
3. You sack! (Said with derision. Imagine applied to Metzler.)

My wife uses:

1. Aahhhh... EAT ME! (When someone is bullshitting here and she wants them to know)

So what about you? Do you have any favorite personal curses?

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Your Favorite Personalized Curse

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  • God Damn Californicators, all move up to Oregon in retirement and ruin our lifestyle. (usually yelled just after yet another car with a California license plate has cut me off or is tailgating on the freeway at 70MPH in Portland).
    • How do you call on Orgegon resident on the road?



      Seriously, though. The speed limit is extreme 55mph. Of course in Oregon it means that everyone drives in the fast lane, at the blazing speed of 48-51 mph.

      No wonder why your own politicians don't let you fill your own goddam gas tank, either. (Altough I suspect it is a clever scam to keep the unemployment/welfare rate low).

      Guess where I live! ;-)

      PS: no offense is meant, so please take it in good humor. Of course if you do 70mph in 55 that abo
  • I prefer compound phrases with either alliteration or assonance/consonance, although the latter sounds better.

    Random compounds work too.

    So you get things like "rectal retaliator" and "chunk-chomper" when I have time to think about it, and things like "shitcock" and "anal-clown" when I don't.
  • A friend of a friend had his standard line: "You cock-knocking cumstain!"

    My brother's current fave: "I wouldn't piss on him if he were on fire."

    Another old fave: "Sweet molasses motherfuckers!"

    All rather harmless compared to yours, but they sound so good...



  • gosh.
  • For "catchphrases" :)

    I'm also fond of calling people "Jackson Hole". It *sounds* dirty, sort of, but it's not really. Is it?

  • by nizo ( 81281 )
    My curses are pretty boring, but one thing I always do when I see some dumbass weaving around in traffic (like they are driving in the indy 500 or something) especially if they just whipped out in front of me I must exclaim, "Whip it good!", followed by a few stanzas from the Devo classic, after which the tune is stuck in my head for hours (like now auuuggghhhh).
  • I always like "Great Caeser's Catfish." Plus it sounds like a interesting dinner.
  • "fuck you you cock quaffing leprachan, you ride a bicycle with no seat because you are the shattered remains on a one man gang rape who's mom just got fucked by 30 men and you're next."

    Yeah. Thats it.
  • Except, of course, for the good old kurat ("devil") that sometimes manages to slip into every kuradi sentence. Aside from that, i mostly use milder curses, which i combine liberally. Or cuss in other languages (English, Russian).

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