everything seems to be happening so fast. nothing seems real. actually two things do. that i am loved and that i'm home.
reading dave's journal about what i had planned out seems crazy to me right now. i can't imagine that it was really that bad, but i know it was. knowing i'll be on meds. for the rest of my life doesn't seem so bad anymore. dave makes it sound so easy. almost everyone takes meds. for something or other. i will learn to live with this. i can honestly say this has been the happiest day of my life.
most people don't get a second chance. a chance to truely start over. i am one of the lucky. i'm even luckier because i've got so many people out there whom i don't even really know that actually give a damn about what happens to me.
i am going to spend the next couple of weeks just to chill out and get used to this "second life". i want to go to work so badly and be able to pay for what dave has given me, but i know deep down that no amount of money can do that. i think for him, just living and taking care of myself (taking my meds.) is all he wants.
today we started to plan out how to turn his office room into a bedroom for me. that was fun and weird at the same time. i feel safe here and at home. most of all i know i'm wanted and loved very much. feeling that today has made accepting his help sooooooooooo much easier. i don't know how long i'll be here, but i know i won't be going anywhere until we are BOTH sure i'm ready and able to go.
thanks again for all your words of encouragement. it means a lot to me AND it helps:)
thanks a bunch guys! till next time....