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Journal The Turd Report's Journal: The Turd Report 09/21/2003 4

Yesterday, I had blue crabs and steamed, spiced shrimp from the DC Wharf. I had a bit of tea this morning and that got my ass in gear, as it were. I also had a craving for milk for some reason, I must have drank a gallon of it yesterday. Anyway, this mornings turd started w/o any assistance, but there was a bit of pushing towards the middle. It went quick and there was no gas. I have a touch of a cold, so I can't give a good report on the smell. the turd itself was very loose, but not diareah. There was still a turd shape to it. It was very broken up and it was hard to determine length, but there was a fair amount of poop. It was a light brown color, almost tan. Clean up was easy with 2 whipes and a wet-wipe/dry-wipe finish. I rate this turd a 6.

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The Turd Report 09/21/2003

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  • I've never heard of using any type of 'wet' wipe. Do you wet toilet paper or use like a child's wipe?
    • They are the exact same thing as child's wipes, just with out the teddy bears and horsies on the packaging. I use dry paper to get all the big nasty bits off, then use the wet wipe to ensure total cleaness and once more with the dry paper to dry and spot check. Try it, you will love it; your butt will love it too.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments. -- Earl Wilson