berck's Journal: Metaxa

I like Metaxa. [Ed. note: This line is to legitimize the subject line.] [Ed.'s Ed. note. The author rarely legitimizes his subject lines, and it's awfull presumptuous of you to attempt to guess his intentions] [Ed. reply: bite me]

I'm not sure if i I should agree with John Cusack's character in Hi Fidelity when he asks, "Is this Peter fucking Frampton??" but I'm inclined. Why then, you might ask, am I listening to him? I don't know. Because he was mentioned in Hi Fidelity?

While driving somewhere in Northern La recently, I decided that I would try to experiment with being more honest in my journal. Not that I tell falsehoods, just that I simply don't tell all. Not even that I really tell lies of ommission. I simply felt that I should be more... open? I odn't like the sounds of "open". It sounds like a very womanlike term one might apply to a friendship.

I've been wondering about whether or not one should maintain such seemingly private information on the web. But since my last name isn't used, it would be difficult for a web searcher to turn me up. A search without my last name primarily turns up references to kite-flying events in the plage of Berck sur Mer. As interesting as they are, they are hardly incriminating. But then, this journal isn't really incriminating either. Just... personal. Probably more personal than I would tend to be with some people who might stumble ("Hey, have you checked out my journal?") upon it.

I've got this great fear of becoming, as I put to Todd not so long ago, "a Starbucks customer". Even from that very comment wafted the air of that which I was afraid of becoming. Not the smell of coffee, but the odor of, at least as Todd put it, pseudo-intellectual. I'm not a fan of that word. Maybe because I'm not sure how to define it. I wonder how dictionary.com defines it. As best I can tell it doesn't. A google search turns up http://www.ram.org/ramblings/ramblings.html which is interesting. The author of the page simply claims that he is, in fact, pseudo-intellectual, the pseudo-modesty allowing others to think that maybe he really is an intellectual. Is that what I'm doing, but in a different way? Perhaps. How is a pseudo-intellectual defined, except by what others think. And I don't care what others think. Really. Or so I keep trying to convince myself. So in my pseudo-not-caring, I shouldn't care if I'm a pseudo-intellectual or not, I should just be, and not worry about it. Right. So I don't really care if you think I'm a pseudo-intellectual or not. Really.

His page is entitled "Pseudo-Intellectual Ram-blings" but I think that what I type is far more likely to be classified as rambling. That's what it is, rambling. Probably more likely to be considered pseudo-intellectual. Oh, right, I don't care.

I like Smog. At least, the band with that name. I'm not such a fan of smog, though it does provide for exceptional sunsets, particularily in Rome. Or maybe it's just that because I was in Rome everything seemed exceptional. Don't suppose that really matters. I like Pavement as well. Two bands with a similar sounding lead vocalist named after things very... civilized.

I wonder if I really like Metaxa, or I just think I do/should. I wonder if that question really has much of a meaning.

Why is it that to my unfocused eyes I was convinced that "Devotion" was really "Dresden"?