Journal EnlightenmentFan's Journal: Book proposal time : Estimating word count 7
Writing a book is like putting on your most gorgeous outfit for an all-night party with all the people you like. Writing a book proposal is like being kidnapped, in your oldest underwear, to convince some grumpy space-aliens why Earth should be saved.
So why am I writing about this here in Slashdot? Aside from the obvious reason (avoiding work), I am inspired by Lingqi's Japan journal to write about stuff going on in my real life, assuming that fellow nerds will be interested. In fact, more of us probably plan to write books some day than will ever visit Japan, which is a good thing for Japan, because those islands would sink into the sea under the weight of the world's potential authors.
A typical trade-book proposal is between 15 and 70 pages long. Most of that is bits of your book in progress--that part is no problem. The annoying things, in no particular order, are your author biography, proposed word count, market analysis, and discussion of the competition.
The author biography is where the author explains (third-person pronouns preferred) that the already incredibly-famous author is taking a break from singing on MTV, making touchdowns on ESPN, and saving the world on CNN to write a book that millions of people are already dying to buy. This for me is the underwear-talking-to-aliens part.
The proposed word count is a technical problem, and therefore kind of fun. I went at the issue like a typical nerd--looking up techniques on the web. It turns out the editors don't really care about the number of words at all--what they want is to figure out the number of pages, estimating 250 words per page. Since my book has lots of pictures, plus about a thousand jokes, most of them with titles (each title, taking up a line, is estimated at about 13 words), I spent hours this weekend computing words and pages.
Then, after I was all finished, I realized all I really had to do was to take down a book from my shelf that looked the right size and shape for the book I wanted, count the pages of that book, and that was my page count, or (multiplied by 250), that was my word count. So if you've read this far in my journal entry, you can write your book proposal faster than I did.
I suppose you've already done the other worst... (Score:2)
In either case, the metaphor of being kidnapped by aliens while wearing your rattiest dirty underwear is remarkably apt. I would have said it was kind of like being peer-reviewed by a panel consisting of a couple old newshounds (the kind who, whenever you say anything say, "But that's old news!"), a bean-counter, and a professor (of the appropriate subject) who doubles as the resident nitpicker. That's considerably more prolix than your description, though.
I will concur that most writerly "self-marketing" ventures are real Baphometic Fire Baptisms (thank you Thomas Carlyle), but they do get easier the second time...
Re:I suppose you've already done the other worst.. (Score:2)
I like your Carlyle quote!
Sartor Resartus (Score:2)
If I must read Transcendentalists, though, I prefer William Blake.
Re:Sartor Resartus (Score:2)
BTW, I had no idea until I read your journal that right-wing nitwits and left-wing pundits were so enthusiastically teamed up to create bad feeling between the US and Canada. Most US folk think of Canada as about the sensiblest, pleasantest bunch of people on the planet and would be pretty hurt to see those yellow snowballs flying our way. I don't think there's any dispute that Gore won the popular vote here, and if the Democrats could have gotten their act together to stand up to Bush in the last election we'd all be much better off.
Bad feeling? No, I think not. (Score:2)
However, if you didn't know, occasionally making fun of USian gaffes is one of the Great Canadian Pastimes. Sensible and pleasant we may be, but we are also masters of the "amused annoyance" species of humour (or is that "annoyed amusement"?). If you don't believe me, watch The Royal Canadian Air Farce and This Hour Has 22 Minutes (incidentally, occasionally anti-government political humour paid for by the Canadian government through the CBC). Talk about your basic "annoyed amusement"!
A telling cultural comment on US/Canadian media politics: When the Air Farce won a prestigious award, Jean Chretien and Shiela Copps did an "Air Farce" sketch on television at the awards ceremony playing Roger Abbott and Luba Goy playing themselves. (That is, they were acting like Roger Abbott and Luba Goy acting like Jean Chretien and Shiela Copps.) When was the last time the US President and one of the high-ranking Cabinet members appeared on national TV making fun of themselves (on purpose)?
My last journal entry, incidentally, was intended to be funny -- I couldn't decide whether to file it under "The Media" or "It's Funny, Laugh." Perhaps it's just another one of those "Canadian Humour Things." In any case, I don't really think there's any "bad feeling" going around...except maybe in Pat Buchanan's fetid little brain where, I suspect, everything always feels bad. (He has "symptoms consistent with early-onset Alzheimers," apparently.)
You might be able to skip the underwear part (Score:1)
If you are willing to do the publishing yourself, all you need to do is apply for a block of ISBN numbers (10 at a time?), write the book, do your own editing (read: buy some beer for a friend and have him/her (preferabbly a liberal arts major) read it over - before s/he downs too many beers), and print 'em out.
I know this because I co-published (ha!) a book with my mother (she did all the work, hence the "ha"), and the entire ordeal (from ISBN to final product) was a couple thousand for a run of about 2000 books?
Granted, though - this means that you'd have to negotiate contracts with bookstores to carry your book(s) too; but on the other hand publishers are usually quite brutal in their contracts with all except the most famous of authors, so...
My mom said that one of her professors in college had his own printhouse because it was more economical / less hassle / something or another than going through publishers.
Re:You might be able to skip the underwear part (Score:2)
I like the idea of getting an agent--somebody who _likes_ to sell stuff--so that I have more time to spend writing books, hiking, goofing around reading Slashdot, etc. Also, the agent is supposed to know how to get a good deal from the publisher.
Your mom sounds like a cool and intrepid person, I hope she (and you) had fun producing her book.