Catch up on stories from the past week (and beyond) at the Slashdot story archive

 



Forgot your password?
typodupeerror
×
VA

Journal The Turd Report's Journal: The Turd Report 11/22/2002 2

My doc put me on a new medication. It is called RenaGel and it is a phosphorus binder. It does something more that bind phosphorus; it also binds my turds in to big rocks. I woke up at 4am. I had not pooped in about 36 hours, but I had eaten during that time. I had the urge to poop and I made my way into the bathroom. The turd did not want to come out, it tried but would just stall at the critical exit point. Pushing just made it feel worse; it was like pooping a cinder block. But, after 2 to 3 minutes of pushing it came out with a satifying 'plop'. And that was it, just one turd. It was easily 3 inches in diameter, but was only 5 inches long. It appeared to be lumpy, as if it was made of several little turdletts. It was dark brown in color and had no odor. Clean up was easy; it took only two wipes. However, Seeing how big it was (in diameter) I flushed this turd w/o paper. It clogged the toilet. I rate this turd as a 7.
This discussion has been archived. No new comments can be posted.

The Turd Report 11/22/2002

Comments Filter:

I tell them to turn to the study of mathematics, for it is only there that they might escape the lusts of the flesh. -- Thomas Mann, "The Magic Mountain"

Working...