Did I mention one of my other motivations for my recent surgery?
Her name was Vanessa Facen.
No, I didn't know her. In fact, all I know is what I've seen in the news stories.
But the story has always bugged me.
Okay, so a 35 year old pre-op transsexual, with "no history of violence or mental health problems" is found naked and bleeding in her neighbor's condo, having thrown herself through a window, and later becomes violent and combative.
And blah blah blah, she fights with police and they smother her or something. That's what people are focusing on.
My question is: WHY?
Why was she naked? Why did she break into her neighbor's home? Why was she behaving this way, all of a sudden? Was she disoriented?
Why was she behaving this way in the first place?
I sincerely doubt she woke up one morning and decided that she wanted to die in a long drawn-out fight with sheriff's deputies. And I think burglars typically wear clothes. I don't think a typical burglar starts by getting naked and flinging herself through an unopened window. Something's just not quite right here.
I think maybe something was wrong with Vanessa. Something medical. But what?
I knew that drugs were a possibility, but the toxicology report seems to rule that out. So, what then?
After I read the first story, I had two guesses: stroke, or hormone imbalance. Disorganized thinking and confusion can be symptoms of a stroke, and being on estrogen increases the risk of a stroke. And anybody who's struggled with their testosterone/estrogen balance knows what it's like to try to fight that inner demon that gives you the overwhelmingly angry urge to smash things and hit people.
So when I first read this story last year, it had quite an impact on me. Because I've had a stroke, and there's a chance I could have another, a chance that was even greater given the megadoses of estrogen I was taking at the time. And I was struggling with the same combative behavior issue, and had for *years*, although I often did a good job of hiding it.
I realized that the exact same thing could happen to me. It scared the hell out of me.
And I knew that, post-orchiectomy, my estrogen dose would go down, my risk of stroke would go down, and my emotions might become easier to manage, thus reducing *my* chances of being killed in police custody for having a medical problem I had no control over.
Post-SRS, I may not even have to worry about being taken to the men's jail if I'm arrested. (While she had lived as a woman for 15 years, Vanessa was being taken to the men's jail downtown because she still had male bits. That's how it works here.)
The world is a very scary place for aliens and transsexuals.
I hope I'm at least a little safer now.
More on this story if it develops...