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Journal Migor's Journal: Migor IS displeased 2

In the bald light of the morning, Migor did awaken to discover a ferocious band of Hoppaplops had settled in his 7th stomach. The most vicious of all the native tribes of the known Universe, the Hoppaplops were protected by a guilty set of those who make laws, and those who made the laws did allow the Hoppaplops to do whatever they pleased.

Migor did hate them. It is not the fault of Migor that when 100 billion Astro-Years ago Migor's great great ancestors did colonize the known Universe, they did terrible things to the Hoppaplops. For example, they did battle with the Hoppaplops for planets over games of connect four, and they did cheat by spray-painting the checkers when the Hoppaplops were not looking.

And while Migor did sleep, the Hoppaplops did set up a entire colony in Migor's 7th stomach, complete with a post office and a beer tent for the upcoming Hoptoberfest, the ancient Hoppolopian holiday which celebrates the defeat of General Charles D. Serpico of Tarvon 91 in the most ruthless tournament of connect four the known Universe has ever known. In the aftermath, over 100 billion Tarvon men were killed, while a dozen or so ugly Tarvon virgins became known to the Hoppaplops.

According to known Space Law, it is illegal to harm the Hoppaplops in any way, shape or form. Even the mightiest of mighty, Migor, was not immune to this law, which was written upon the ancient Scrolls as the laws of the infallible. There are only 100 of these laws which are enforced by a subspace band of marshals who will explode the brain of any who break them.

So Migor does have to wait for the Hoppaplops to leave his 7th stomach, and in the meantime can only eat the gilded tongue of the Royal Tarvonian Aardvark (Which does cost over t 0.39/lb (approximately 12 Earth cents (according to the latest exchange rates))), and he can only drink ginger ale. Once a week he is allowed a raspberry pop-tart. Anything else would be considered a violation of the law as it might harm the Hoppaplops.

So now Migor does sit in his mighty spaceship blowing up random inhabited planets in frustration of his plight.

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Migor IS displeased

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  • It is good that Migor is back. Doctor O was already missing him. Somebody else had already welcomed Migor back, so Doctor O is only second in saying this.

    Doctor O is not angry, but he is displeased. He will now get back into his laboratory and turn some more volunteers from the basement into alien mutant TV Preachers. This will please Dr. O. And it will hopefully replace some of those dumb TV Shopping shows with something more fun to watch.

    He will tell these ones to preach getting to heaven by becoming like the Goatse man. Doctor O is looking forward to the press coverage.

Life in the state of nature is solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short. - Thomas Hobbes, Leviathan