Liora's Journal: No need to worry, I'm now single...

I just thought I would take (another) moment and say that you all gave the greatest advice... I did not do the time apart thing. I talked to my mom, and she asked me a few well-formulated questions, and I concluded I needed to break up with him based upon my answers.

So, as suggested, I broke up with him, cleanly and immediately. I did it over the phone (yes, bad form, I know, but I knew that in person he'd talk me out of it, and then I'd just have to do it again later). I went down the checklist as suggested 1. breaking up, 2. why, 3. he will find someone else 4. goodbye. Yeah, that's what I did.

Well, I'm a little down, and I called him last night although I probably shouldn't have, but we didn't get back together from it, and hopefully my calculus book is returned and sitting on my front porch (school started today... I am taking the 3D calc class and it uses the same book as the last one...). Thanks a bunch. I shall write personal thank yous later, but I have to get some work done this morning.

Bad Times...

[FortKnox]

Things are probably seeming a bit dismal, lately. Especially when you have to deal with school. A few suggestions:
Take a bath for at least 30-60 minutes (even if you arne't a bath person. If you really hate them, take a looong shower). This is time by yourself. Cry if you have to. Think, and let go of your emotions. You'll feel better afterward.
Once you've had some time by yourself, go out with your friends to something relaxing, like to dinner (not something that takes a lot of energy like dancing). Don't drink. Stay off the juice for a little bit. Drinking while down == bad news.

We're always around, so feel free to drop a journal entry if you need a pickmeup (or email one of us).

Geez, now I know why I'm viewed as a 'father-figure'... heh. Anyway, I hope you start feelin better, and give us a hollar if you have time.

Feel Better?

[daoine]

I don't know what kind of break-up person you are, but for me, the hardest part is always coming to the decision of breaking up. If things were suddenly that clear to you - then you didn't need time apart to sort things out. You just needed to get out. So, ya did good, chickee. :)

You're braver than I

[Some Woman]

It takes guts to be able to quickly come to a rational decision and stick to it.

(Hopefully) the hardest part is already done.

Good Thinking!

[TechnoLust]

The "over the phone, because he'd talk you out of it in person" idea was good. I don't know how many times I've seen that happen. And you are right, it just postpones the inevitable. There isn't much I can say, but you know how to reach me if you need to.

Re:Good Thinking!

[Tet]

The "over the phone, because he'd talk you out of it in person" idea was good.

Nope. I have to disagree there. Surely if you've ever felt for someone enough to start a relationship, you should at least have the decency to break up in person. Imagine how it would feel if you were the one on the receiving end. Your partner has decided that they no longer want to be with you. Sad, but it happens. But when they don't even have the decency to tell you to your face? That to me would come across as rubbing salt in the wounds, and would cause significantly more hurt. Just MHO.

good luck!

[Fiver-rah]

I broke up with my boyfriend last January. It really sucked. It's good that you have school starting; it gives you something new to look forward to. What really helped me was to find something new and fun to do so that you start creating fun memories that don't include him. Think of something you've always wanted to do, but never have. Okay, got it? Now go do it! :)

Congratulations

[Nyarly]

It's important that you remember that it was for the best - that it's a positive step. It's never an easy thing to do, and you had excellent reasons. Now, the other thing to do is examine the relationship in hindsight. (A few weeks from now...) What did you learn, about people, about yourself? Well and good to know that you did right (and you did) but you do best when you improve as a result.

good call.

[denshi]

It's not a common thing to congratulate someone on ending a relationship, but you did the right thing. Esp. after determining that you were glossing over the problems in your bond. "In marriage, two become one" does not mean that each brings only half a person to the union.

Anyway, good luck.

PHEW!!

[iggly_iguana]

Now there's hope for the rest of us!!! We were worried that you were off the market!! ;)