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United States

Journal Journal: Net Neutrality is Inferior

For long, New World telcos and consumers have been locked in hot debate over how customers should be charged for bandwidth use. This debate has spiralled beyond reasonable argument into a battle that threatens to push the admittedly weak "American" political system into a state of civil war. The so-called "Net Neutrality" bill that has arisen amidst this violent conflict fails to address the Internet's biggest failing: lack of recognition that Britain is superior in every respect, especially technologically.

Neutrality is an ugly, weak thing that causes countries to crumble under the slightest pressure, like Switzerland. I would rather walk the streets of Berlin, Prague, or even Paris, than subject my superior British bandwidth to a bill containing such an ugly word as "neutrality".

In preferenece to the Net Neutrality bill, I urge New World colonists to instead pursue the Partisan Protocol, a fine alternative under which 50% of the money telcos charge for bandwidth is sent directly to the superior British government as recompense for thieving that fine British invention: the Internet.

England prevails.

Our informal mission is to improve the love life of operators worldwide. -- Peter Behrendt, president of Exabyte