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the_mad_poster (640772)

the_mad_poster
  shattoc@adelphia.com
http://www.gh-sts.com/HOWTO
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Journal of the_mad_poster (640772)

Questions I Wish I Had Answers For

[ #110340 ]
Saturday June 25 2005, @10:02PM
User Journal

1. How long can a human being survive on only Doritos?

2. How does one get to be an engineer for a company like Ferrari?

3. Alcohol constricts blood flow to the brain, effectively making you dumber, yet most people feel happier as they get drunk. Human beings are driven to success, which generally requires one's wits about them, and often makes people unhappy. Does that mean that a healthy human brain drives a person to be miserable?

4. Why does it make most people feel better to insult someone than to compliment that person?

5. Does god watch porn?

6. Regular soap doesn't kill any significantly dangerous microbes, it just helps loosen solid dirt. Yet, people insist you should wash your hands after using the restroom. If I don't pee on my hands though, why should I bother?

7. Why is it more important to human beings to FEEL like something is true than to KNOW it's true, even if they KNOW it's false?

8. If we can't communicate with any other form of life on the planet, why do we think we're the smartest (more specifically: how do we KNOW we're the smartest)?

9. If all you have to do to have peace is stop shooting at each other, why can't we all do it at once?


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Questions I Wish I Had Answers For 23 Comments More | Login /

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  • easy!
    1. How long can a human being survive on only Doritos?
    3-5 days. you need water too. since it's a dry food, it may be faster.

    2. How does one get to be an engineer for a company like Ferrari?
    go to school in italy and interview at ferrari. probably having an abundant amount of testosterone couldn't hurt.

    3. Alcohol constricts blood flow to the brain, effectively making you dumber, yet most people feel happier as they get drunk. Human beings are driven to success, which generally requires one's wi
  • 1. Depends on what said human wants to weigh.

    2. Engineering school would be an excellent start. Moving to Italy probably wouldn't hurt, either.

    3. Yes.

    4. Low self esteem, you monkeyjuggling turdburglar!

    5. We are god's porn.

    6. Part the first: It breaks down oils and similar, allowing nasties to be more easily rinsed and wiped off. Part the next: Piss is essentially sterile. In fact, it's antiseptic. The place in a bathroom you'll find the fewest bugs: inside a urinal. Most bugs: doorknob. It's not whethe
  • Human beings are driven to success, which generally requires one's wits about them, and often makes people unhappy. Does that mean that a healthy human brain drives a person to be miserable?

    Humans are driven to success but are generally mistaken about the definition of the word.
  • Well... pee (the urine of a healthy individual anyway) doesn't contain bacteria. What it does contain is waste products from various processes in the body. So you're washing away the impurities that most bodies are trying to rid themselves of by peeing. Of course... there are times when you don't use the restroom to pee. Taking a crap, for example, WILL provide ample populations of viruses and bacteria and god knows what else. THAT is why washing one's hands is important. Then we also have the populat
    • It happens every time I say that gays feel love the same way that heteros do.

      Might wanna rephrase that one, as this particular hetero is not usually all that sore afterwards, yaknowwhatImean?

      Not that there's anything wrong with it.
  • 8. If we can't communicate with any other form of life on the planet, why do we think we're the smartest (more specifically: how do we KNOW we're the smartest)?
    Sore we can communicate with lots of other forms of life on the planet. Ask any dog owner.
    • Ah, but does your dog consider the categorical imperative when you say "fetch"?

      I thought not. Cats, however, clearly have superior intelligence, for they do consider the categorical imperative when you tell them "fetch". They tell you to shove off.

      Cheers,

      Ethelred
      (who was allowed to make this post by Cleo-Kitty, and he is grateful to Her Worship for such gracious permission)

      • No, but last weekend, while I was walking them in the shopping centre parking lot, one of them went to the end of his leash, around a woman, and back and around me, jamming us both together. Lots of laughs, and "How did you teach them to do THAT?" Bet your cats can't do THAT!
        • Ah, but you see, there is no need to teach cats anything, for they already know all.

          Aside from how to open a tin of food on their own, that is. Oh, and that the light from a flashlight is not a living creature. But other than that, boy, do they know all.

          Cheers,

          Ethelred

  • You're right, we could. If.

    Your premise is wrong. Stopping the shooting is just a start, because you can't have peace while anyone is shooting. But stopping the shooting doesn't make all the other problems go away. For example, stopping the shooting doesn't make the Jews leave the Middle East, nor does it make the Palistinians simply go away. [i say we give both sides more weapons and let them obliterate each other, then when the place is unpopulated we move in all the protestants from northern ireland. two

  • Alcohol constricts blood flow to the brain, effectively making you dumber, yet most people feel happier as they get drunk. Human beings are driven to success, which generally requires one's wits about them, and often makes people unhappy. Does that mean that a healthy human brain drives a person to be miserable?

    I think where you went wrong is, "Human beings are driven to success, which generally requires one's wits about them." Human beings tend to act like any other animals, especially when wearing be

  • 6. Regular soap doesn't kill any significantly dangerous microbes, it just helps loosen solid dirt. Yet, people insist you should wash your hands after using the restroom. If I don't pee on my hands though, why should I bother?

    Reminds me of a joke:

    There is an accountant, a lawyer, and an engineer taking a leak. The lawyer finishes, washes his hands, then uses 12 paper towels to dry off. "I was taught to be very thorough," he says. The accountant finishes, washes his hands, and uses one sheet of pape
      • Being a former-Jarhead with a father who retired from the Navy, I can see the humour (and reality) in that...
        .
        .
        .
        A short story (condensed for brevity)...

        4-Stars (General/Admiral) from each service were having a competition on which service members has the most balls.

        Naval Admiral tells his sailor to get on the carrier catapult an launch himself. Sailor gets on the catapult, gets launch and promptly dies.

        "Now that took balls," said the Navy Admiral.

        Army General tells a soldier to jump in front of a tank

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