You're seriously telling us that you're incapable of drilling a tiny hole and fashioning a small length of wire into an earring loop? My guess is that projecting that deficiency onto the original poster is probably in error, not to mention that it was meant in humor to begin with.
Nope, the original poster specified "pretty". I'm sure I could ham-fistedly drill small holes in bits of gold. However the result would be blob of gold on the ear, not a pretty pair of earrings as specified.
The reason jewelery costs more than the raw materials is it is not easy to make good bits of.