Either just say, "... my ISP, Comcast..." or don't name them at all. Trying to be cute just muddles the conversation and gains absolutely nothing.
Why do you care about other people's results, too? Just upload a large file to somewhere with known good bandwidth (amazon S3 might be a good choice, or FTP it to Dreamhost, or whatever), time it, then pull it back down again (and time that). You'll get a pretty accurate "actual bandwidth" there.
If you're paranoid - and it appears that you are - make the file something unique and check the checksums in both places (or just record a brand new 60 second video, timed upload it from one machine, then timed download it to another and play it). No way that anyone can optimize that transfer - if they could, they wouldn't be wasting the technology on you (and, quite frankly, if they could move 7 megabits/second over a "5 megabit/second pipe" then they'd be entitled to say that they had a 7mpbs pipe.
Not everything needs a dedicated app.