Mind you, my primary form of contraception is never having sex. My wife hates to try (her idea of foreplay is, "I think I'm drunk enough. Go.") and I had to give up after years of nothing but bad sex followed by 30 minutes of her crying afterwards. I'm no good for entertainment, no good for reproduction. What good am I?
I don't want to post any more. I'm sad.
I wish this didn't make me laugh so hard. Now I feel bad. nah, no i don't.