Well there's your problem.
You do realize that chimpanzees are genetically much closer to us than any aliens could possibly be, don't you?
Except by some amazing (read: impossible) fluke, you could substitute any known life form for "chimpanzees" in the above sentence.
There was no war...
I think you mean: "We have always been at war with East Asia"
"Anyone attempting to generate random numbers by deterministic means is, of course, living in a state of sin." -- John Von Neumann