[The Plaintiff] also sues on behalf of the United States of America in the nature of a private attorney general, under theories of a derivative action, as well as a third party beneficiary of any relevant agreement[s] Defendant Snowden executed and other obligations he breached.
Anytime you see the phrase "Private Attorney General", run... (it's one of those freemason-of-the-land catchphrases).
3. Upon information and belief, Plaintiff, and the American people he represents have a recognized right to seek derivative and direct and indirect relief against officials who have a duty to act under the extraordinary facts of this case and recoup for the United States Government, the Plaintiff and all others similarly situated.
Yeaahhh... uh-huh, sure.
The complaint is actually signed by a practicing attorney. I'm shocked it wasn't pro-se.
[...] to the nearest runway at Dulles International Airport [...]
Far more likely to take him to Andrews AFB.
But then Places like Comcast pay nearly minimum wage for the poor guys that do video conversion and upload, so if done late in the day the chance that they will just copy and call it done is high.
Sounds like that's the place to attack then - hand the minimum wage guy a USB stick and a bag of money.
Marvelous! The super-user's going to boot me! What a finely tuned response to the situation!