I think I might be arguing at cross purposes here.
You made what I assume was sarcastic comment (But no, it's pretty obvious that one dongle joke can cause a young lady who had a driving passion to simply drop it) that implied (at least to my ear) that it was ridiculous that a dongle joke would drive such a person out of the industry.
My reply is that the vast majority of programmers aren't there with a driving passion, and thus, yes, juvenile antics might make them look elsewhere.
I have no idea where you got any claim from me about who was doing the harassing from. Unless proven otherwise, I assume that you are professional in your conduct.
Women are somehow utterly destroyed by Lena Söderberg's face and dongle jokes.
Can we get real here? No one is being destroyed here. But a professional in a professional environment should not have to put up with the juvenile sexual innuendo. There is not a single adult working in the industry who should not be capable of, well, acting like an adult. If they want to let their inner 13-year old go, do it well away from the workplace or related events.
Do you think that you can scrub all sex from every industry?
Frankly, yes. Losing jobs due to one-of puerile behaviour is probably overkill, but the reality is that reacting proportionately has simply meant that the behaviour has hung around decades past it's expiry date. And yes, lots of women aren't going to be offended. Some people don't mind jokes ridiculing their ethnicity. But enduring such should not be requirement for entry in the field.
And as far as you and I are concerned, we are both part of the dominant race, gender, and culture in the tech industry. We'd have to be radically insecure for anything to bother us because our superiority is pretty much assured. But saying that this has bearing on other people is like the millionaire telling the homeless person "Don't worry about having that $10 stolen from you. After all, they stole $10 from me as well." It's just not the same thing.
It all reminds me of when I was about 9 and joined a after-school sports team. There was one guy who basically greeted his team-mates by whacking them from behind. We all hated it, and being a bit of cry-baby, I asked him to stop multiple times. He said that was the way he said hi, and it probably was. I was obviously "weak", and after the 4th or 5th time, I told a parent, who told him to stop. He resumed shortly thereafter, so I told the parent again. this time the kid got yelled at.
Problem solved. Everybody was happier, except for the kid who had to control himself. Was he malicious? From the perspective of hindsight, probably not. He probably had older obnoxious brothers. But in the end, it didn't matter, he was making life miserable for lots of others, and the behaviour had to stop.
Juvenile sexual behaviour makes lots of people uncomfortable and it also provides suitable cover for true predators. Far, far better to have a nice simple line with no ambiguity.
Because if the harassment bar is lowered this far, there is no other cure than a complete separation of males in females, because the females are too weak.
Goodness you have a low opinion of humanity. In 35 years, I've yet to have to deal with sexual "humour" in a workplace environment, and I'm as puritanical as they come. (Admittedly, I've projected "death-of-fun" since I was 20, but the point still stands.) We are all perfectly capable of restraining our personal lives to our personal time, or at least moderating our personal lives on professional time to what won't offend anyone. And change is inevitable. 40 years ago, some companies held sales meetings in strip clubs and some men had pin-ups on their cubicles. It was unthinkable that any real salesman would object. Now the idea is ridiculous. 25 years ago, the workplace could do without anyone who was so weak they couldn't handle the person in the adjacent cubicle smoking. After all, that was what the workplace looked like. It was insanity itself to assume that men weren't going to be men or smokers weren't smokers.
Oddly enough, men can be a lot of things. Smokers turned out be able to adapt. It won't be the end of the world. 20 years from now, we'll be shaking our heads at what women and minorities had to put up with in the work place and wondering what took so long.
That one percent you are in thrall to won't be satisfied no matter how much we try to "help" them.
That "one percent" is probably one in 10,000. However, they often reflect a general feeling that is utterly ignored for decades. To use a made-up example, sometimes it takes someone threatening a ridiculous lawsuit over the use of the word "girls" for the boss to finally realize that 50% of the workforce was utterly fed up with his use of "the girls in the office". Their quiet, consistent, polite remarks didn't even register for 30 years because he couldn't even conceive that anyone would be offended.
I'm amazed at how often the "ridiculous demand" is simply the expression of a widely felt anger over conditions that management could ignore for decades. It doesn't require malice. We all assume our cultural precepts are universal. So a significant kick is often what's required to actually generate any real change.