The bigger the government, the smaller the citizen. Quit arguing about how to use the government against the "other side", whichever side you are on. If you don't want the government making you pay for Iraq, shrink the government. If you don't want the government telling Catholics they have to fund birth control and abortifacients, shrink the government.
Quit using the government as a stick with which to beat your enemies, then complaining when they turn around and use it to beat on you.