War in La Jolla, seventh year, one hundred and thirty-second entry
This Lent, learn what soap may do for you and your fast. Lenten trivia for the worldwide paschal season recorded older than Egypt, who exactly was Zechariah? What did he do? When did you personally invent the chainsaw?
Over the years as homeless, this town of rich kids and millionaires began with dinner dresses and darn near tuxedos all day and all evening long. Now the sidewalk parade has degenerated to be staffed with daytime small time midtime idiots, the high class design district looks like north park to gaslamp and college all day long, filling the waitaround oil cannon of idiots seeping and creeping on one homeless fella. The La Jolla plaza has been sold out to refurbishing because nobody was making any money griping about the idiots "just stopping in" as they mill around filling the show running down to and buzzing up on the bottom walkway. The Armani Exchange, usually strategically positioned that such high class trimmed fashion need not deal with riff-raff (the mall cannons pick them off and hustle them on their business and out the door), has decided to pack up shop from midtown and retreat to the mall where they have the protection from morons making up excuses to talk, often loud and idiotic after prepping themselves with super saturday duty to run down and spit stupid at the homeless man. The most stylish heat in this area, without turning to millionaire halloweenism, is the Guess wrapper on one of my totes.
Over the years, this town of rich kids and millionaires had lots of stories, and excuses, and fingers to point, and claims to make, and blame to assign, and maybe not this one but that one, and oh sorry which one was it or the other one, were they really homeless or were they playing a game or pouting a spell, did this happen or that happen, was it here or there, maybe a blue screen and a few extra sound bites from some other time... over the years there have been many stories and lines, many excuses and guesses, heard about one of these or those, worried about this or that. Over the years they've cut down all the trees and put up the floodlights. Not only have they taken away sleeping and sitting spots, but they have worn out their excuses and lies, worn out their stories and blames. Turns out the entire parade, the entire watch, the entire excuses and lies... they're all toilet mobbing faggitts and animal dick whoring freaks. That's what it turns out to be, when the floodlights take away the excuses and the bare walls give up the facade. There's nothing wrong with you, it's all about what's wrong with them.
Did I not tell you man was made from clay? How messed up would you like to get in your monster mash with reanimated sewing parts? Enter the house at gerar, get pounded out, would you like to be cut into twelve pieces all at once or would you like to do this on million dollar deformation plans? Too many amps to the kicker, how's that woofer deformity doin' ya? Get all bent out of shape and call it a job, get all mashed up and call it a lwife.
No sex with eunuchs before marriage. You will never truly know how many bumps from left to right until you have counted them all for hours and hours and hours, which you will do more than even a boy if you've been hit with a hot rock and bothered with a superpackage.
May I introduce you to the ritz closet? The spongeblob alcove? Walk into our church, turn for the ladies chapel. At one time I am telling you it looked like a voodoo shrunken head. Now it really looks like spongeblob ritz, father Abram's blind eye (lots of money in that one, about the level of a... anyway), and Zechariah's other hand (the sewing cross of Christ and the soap pokies along side), in modern times remote control hell on wheels.
No sex with eunuchs before marriage. There is absolutely no way to compress that entire process leading up to Adam, create and perfect the technology, staff the world with Mary models, and hit that dead center. If you still "make it" and flip inside out then she'll be slightly imbalanced just every bit as imbalanced to tell (shriek) you about it. "Look at me! All imbalanced like Zebulun and Napthali! Just couldn't wait, could you?!!! You better run and tighten up your abs for me to get the right combination to fill this!" Then yesterday's book of Jonah. The queen of the south, your real ass is the tip of your tongue, which you would know if you thought about flipping inside out, and similarly your brain, if you are doing it right and working on it, gets around to anchoring itself to the bottom of the other side of the inside out. Then the choirs of angels, --funroll-loops. There's the greek fable of all the guys that hit the ground and could have been a perfect race if they hadn't turned on each other and killed each other in a knock down drag out fight. That's not actually --funroll-loops, that's the prophet walking into Ninevah to sack the town, but they've been going downhill for a few thousand years, so all he's able to do is knock the king out and Jehu the immediately surrounding rooms flat... he doesn't actually kick out the full plague for the whole town, because he himself is too boogered up to make it. The big enormous horde of guys rising up and getting killed in the fight is the surrounding Ninevah town sacking the prophet's newly formed temple, or, in larger scale and older times, the surrounding network of Ninevah towns retaking the prophet's town if he did manage to kick up something so big as the plague. Real humans actually get along quite well together.
This Lent, learn what soap may do for you and your fast, learn what fasting is, learn where your frontal lobes are, learn how long the world has been around since before you were born, learn what happened before then.
Where does glue come from? Okay, now where do those come from (father Abram had no camels)? "I am going to sew you into horses and poke you into soap!" That's Elmer, on the bottle of Elmer's glue, a modern day Melchizedek (Mel usually had the big hat with the side horns and all). He is going to sew you into horses and poke you into soap.