Ever listen to football commentary or basketball? Its all color commentary or idiotic observations like "team X won because they scored more points"... no shit, fucktards.
You must have lousy sports coverage in your town, or maybe you just haven't listened to a game in a long time. You get continual analytics in most cases, and statistics that actually mean something. Occasionally, you'll get a fossil like Hawk Harrelson who's just a curmudgeon but even in that case, they teamed him with Steve Stone, who can break down pitch location, OBP, WAR numbers, BABIP, FIP and xFIP.
At least in this town, it's the same for basketball and football, though there haven't been as many advanced statistics developed for those sports. Maybe it's just because Bill James got the ball rolling (sorry) sooner for baseball. But all the announcers are pros and not a single one will give you the kind of obvious nonsense you describe.
Even the hockey coverage in town, whether you're listening to John Weideman and Troy Murry on the radio or Eddie Olczyk on TV, these are guys who will drop numbers on you and give you insights you probably wouldn't have noticed even if you were sitting behind the glass.
Naw man, there hasn't been a "Team X won because they scored more points" in a long while.
We don't need analytics
But people who pay attention to e-Sports and aren't dumb fucks like you might have an interest in analytics. Some people who are interested in video games care about more than whether the female announcer is showing cleavage. One minute you talk about how e-Sports announcers are so great because they give you the "micro" in Starcraft, and then you say you don't need analytics. Do you know what anaylytics are? And did I mention that you're a dumb fuck?