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Comment: Simple reason (Score 5, Funny) 341

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#41535637) Attached to: Why Are We So Rude Online?
Oh, but this is simple. People are rude when, well... Well let me tell you a story of my friend called Dave.

Dave was an ordinary boy with wild imagination. He was popular with the guys for several reasons, but the fact that he and his mother let us play GoldenEye on his Nintendo64 wasn't easy to ignore. All of us guys used to gather at his house and play a few rounds of the great multiplayer experience that only the original GoldenEye gave.

I noticed that people tented to get angry during the game. They would verbally attack other players and even punch them a bit. Dave didn't - he actually seemed quite an non-aggressive fella. What was the secret to Dave's non-aggressive and non-rude behavior? Because his mother made him these wonderful home cooked pizzas. He wasn't angry because he ate well!

Comment: UNIX Differences (Score 4, Funny) 454

When looking for a Windows expert you have to look past the first appearance. I am a hardcore tomato sauce fan. And when I say hardcore, I mean it. Tomato sauce is the base of any pizza we all so like. But beyond that Windows admin can look almost anything, and still be completely usable. Just like your favorite pan pizza.

The best way to illustrate differences between Windows and UNIX admins is the way they use space. The base of the system is usually laid out differently. In UNIX you have / whereas in Windows you use C:\ and other drive letters. It's like the difference between normal italian style pizza and american pan pizza.

Let me tell you a story about a friend from my childhood. He loves Linux. You could say he is Linux power user. Back in the 90's I was over his apartment and we kept playing this Nintendo64 game called GoldenEye. It was awesome. Split-screen multiplayer and even while we could see each other, we still loved it. The levels were laid out beatifically and played out very nicely.

But at some point you obviously become hungry. Then I got an idea.. "Let's call some pizzas over!", I uttered and tried to reach to the phone. However, it was way too far. I crashed down from the couch and now I was rolling around on the floor. My stomach was so big and soft that it kept me in motion and I rolled over the table where the telephone was, crashing it on the floor and breaking it. I said "damn it".. And we didn't get any pizza until we went out in the open. But we still did it, proudly. We were the goldeneye playing pizza bros!

I think the main point is that whatever obstacles you may find with your new friend there is always way to get around them. With pizza.

Comment: Outsourcing saves costs (Score -1) 403

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#40030355) Attached to: Ask Slashdot: Is Outsourcing Development a Good Idea?
While outsourcing does save costs, it can also bring down the quality. Let me tell you an example in the form of analogy that everyone can better understand.

During the nice times before multinationalists corporations took over everything, we used to have tons of great local businesses. Shops, farms and places that were run by local people with care and most importantly, dignity. Just ordinary people who were truly happy when they could offer a good service. What we have now is outsourcing everything to lowest bidder - people who don't actually care about quality or good service.

Back in the days I used to go out to the local farms and other establishments to get our goods. We would enjoy a nice chat and beer with the owners. Then we would buy the goods, like ham, onions, garlic and other good stuff from the friendly people we knew. And we always knew they actually cared about providing quality service and products. After all, it was also their own home town.

In turn, when people came to enjoy our great pizza, they knew they would be enjoying locally produced excellent quality pizza that was prepared with love. This was the time when people and companies would make products and sell services not just for the money, but because it actually made them feel good and proud of themselves. Like I did, and still do. Every time a pizza customer of mine comes to compliment me of my pizza good, I feel great joy and I am proud of actually giving a good service. Where is that with these multinationals?

Comment: The Good Old Pizza Times (Score 5, Funny) 164

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#33065340) Attached to: Pizza Lovers Suffer Data Breach From Hell
This reminds me of the time when I was 13. We had just got out of school and bicycled home. You know why? Because I, let me clarify _I_, had this new awesome game Lemmings. When we got to my house, I would fire up my Amiga and we would just laugh at the stupid lemmings jumping to their death if I didn't do something to stop them. Making them dig, guide others, or give them umbrellas - it was great.

The problem was that later on we obviously got hungry. This happened many times. Someone had to go get some food. Pizza was the obvious choice. But who would it be? I didn't want to. So we played a game of rock paper scissors. Damn, I lost. I tried to have an another round, but they didn't let me. There was nothing I could do.

I had to get up my ass and go get pizza. I asked my friends what they wanted. Adam said he wanted a delicious Pepperoni pizza. Jim said he wanted a Hawaiian pan pizza. I tried to remember their choices and took my bike. On the way over to the restaurant I tried to think what I want. Supreme pizza, double-cheese or maybe double bacon cheeseburger pizza?

I arrived at the pizza place. The taste was beautiful. I felt like I was home. I walked in and ordered three large pizzas, mine being the double bacon cheeseburger pizza. I felt so hungry. I just wanted to grab the pizza and eat. When the pizzas came, I had to eat there. I also took a few pieces of my friends pizzas because I wanted to taste them. Man I was happy.

Back then we didn't have credit cards, so I paid with the small amount of money that was in my pocket. No problems for the vendor, no problems for me, and everything worked greatly. The lesson being - pay with cash.
Linux

+ - What Do You Love About Pizza?

Submitted by PizzaAnalogyGuy
PizzaAnalogyGuy (1684610) writes "I am a professional pizza worker — not in the cheaper around-the-corner pizza places, but in good restaurants. I'd like to ask the slashdot community about what they love in their pizza; how would they like your home delivery and what would make it to geeks to visit our restaurant? We do home-delivery too and it's almost 40% of our business, and while it's good business — we are more interested to know how to get geeky persons more out and eat it in pizza restaurants. We currently maintain series of pay-to-play games that work by putting a coin in. In our experience, this works greatly with couples, but the revenue is only 40% to us and is small. Would it be better to replace those machines with something else, and if so, what? Is there a Linux distro with some packages we could install?"

Comment: Re:Other countries are interesting (Score -1, Troll) 356

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#31209278) Attached to: Perth Game Company CEO Takes IP By Night

Actually I'm asking slashdot. How I am supposed to fight the cheapo crappy pizza places when I offer quality pizzas? Does it matter to keep quality? What you love about pizza?

I love my pizzas to be as cheap as possible.

But why? Apart from the usual everything-as-cheap-as-possible, the pizzas on crap places taste shit. And it's not like it's much different - $1-2 and you get a lot better ingredients, crust and service. If anyone has ever visited any of those cheap pizza places in Europe, you know what I'm talking about.

Comment: Other countries are interesting (Score -1, Offtopic) 356

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#31209230) Attached to: Perth Game Company CEO Takes IP By Night
Remember that it's not so bad to leave a country to do business elsewhere. When I worked in Naples, I would not get almost any pay. Yes, I was a kid and I was supposed to work for my father, but I wanted something off from it. If it doesn't work like you want to, you go somewhere where it does.

Not that it wouldn't be good - Me myself and customers loved great good crust with beautiful cheese, bacon, tomato, ham and barbeque sauce on top of it. And with Mountain Dew. But our counsin had his pizzeria just next to ours - he stole customers from us and we had to fight to fight.

This lead me to escape to America. In the beginning of 90's I started my own pizza place in the Manhattan. It was great time - customers rolled in, were happy and just loved what I baked. But the competition came there too - there was thousands of cheapo kebab/pizza places that offered substandard pizzas to customers with lower prices.

I tried to fight - I tried to it with quality. I tried having free beers and hookers. But people just went to the cheap pizza places. How am I supposed to work with that?

Actually I'm asking slashdot. How I am supposed to fight the cheapo crappy pizza places when I offer quality pizzas? Does it matter to keep quality? What you love about pizza?

Comment: Re:Times have changed (Score 5, Funny) 180

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#30777740) Attached to: Former Exec Says Electronic Arts "Is In the Wrong Business"
..terpiece pizzas, because even if these gamers get more social, not all of their old habits are going to disappear. They will still need their crusty big pizzas with pepperoni, italian sausage, green peppers, red onions and mushroom toppings taken down with a big glass of coca-cola while raiding in WoW. Only that way they can ever find mas...

Comment: Italy in science (Score -1, Offtopic) 118

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#30700896) Attached to: Scientists Turn Wood Into Bone
Everyone always thinks Italy is just about Pizza. While in fact I did grow up in Naples, and my father and his cousin owned a pizza place next to each other, that is not the case.

Tenderly close your eyes and hear a story about my friend who used to work on this project..

There was a good time. It was the beginning of the year 2004. It was a big day. World of Warcraft was going public on this very day. I told my mother to leave us alone in our basement for the night. We had walked to the local pizza joint to get ourselves lots of pizzas. I ordered a Hawaiian style pan-pizza with ham, pineapples, shrimps and salami. In a barbeque sauce. And with coca-cola and mountain dew. Everything was ready. We were ready to enter the world of WoW.

As we dipped our fingers in mayonnaise and grabbed our first slices of the delicious pizza and watched the timer slowly, but painfully run out, we knew we were the best friends. 3.. 2.. 1.. It was time to login. I made a human mage. He made an undead warrior. Stupid decisions - we would be enemies. But we continued playing, and leveled our first dings.

After both eating 4 pizzas and a huge amount of sugar flavoured drinks, we were going mad. It was time to see each others and settle all of our real life battles in the game. We met in wetlands. We would fight to death. The loser would be the everlasting loser. It was a time to win or die!

But as my friend was running towards wetlands, he got hungry. He ran out miserably looking for more delicious pizza. Now I heard about this story and saw his name there, and I'm surprised. I should probably get off his mom's basement now and go home.

Comment: Re:Own fault (Score 5, Funny) 371

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#30641768) Attached to: Monty Wants To Save MySQL
If you go to a pizza joint and order a buffalo chicken style pizza with tender chicken breast, hot sauce, and onions with provolone and American cheeses on a cheddar crust, and eat it with a big glass of mountain dew, you can't just go back and say "Now that I think of it, I would rather have had Hawaiian style pan-pizza with sliced ham, bacon, pineapple and roasted red peppers with provolone cheese on a parmesan crust". You've made your deal already. If you want an another pizza, you have to buy it again.

Comment: Re:I already see this happening (Score -1, Offtopic) 180

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#30584772) Attached to: Adobe Flash To Be Top Hacker Target In 2010
Last night I was spending some time at my friends place. We have a long history raiding together in WoW - he always takes care of me, kills enemies that try to approach me from behind and heals me when I'm on the verge of dieing. He is a person that one might call a "good friend". If he would be a girl, I would marry her. But no patches and no new content in WoW has hit it somewhat. We've already done everything, we've already seen everything and we've already experienced everything together. While waiting for the new expansion, it was time to go test a new Game.

As we left all the possible MMO's to download, we figured it was time to go get a pizza. Truth to be told, we were quite hungry at that point. While walking towards the pizza place, I was just thinking about all the delicious ingredients I could choose from. Should I take a crusty hawaiian style pizza with ham and pineapples, dipped in barbeque sauce and extra cheese and mayonnaise on top. Or would it be better to eat a large pizza with tenderly sliced onions, steak, pepper and mushroom with American cheese on top. Or go wild and order both of them.. I just had to make sure there would be enough room left for pancakes with strawberry jam afterwards as a dessert.

We made our orders and sat on the table to wait. I couldn't wait - two best large pizzas, some coca-cola and pancakes as a dessert. Then all the new MMO's to test. It was a happy day. I was happy.

As the cook brought us our pizzas, he told us there were minor changes on the ingredients as they were out on some. No biggie, I said and paid my pizzas and pancake. We walked back home and started this game called "Eve Online" to test it out, as it looked interesting. At this point, I was almost dieing in hunger. I opened my pizza box and to my surprise.. he had changed the barbeque sauce to mexican sauce! This is madness, I was yelling. But in the end, it was a great pizza, and I still had the another one too. All the crustiness, mayonnaise, cheese and fresh taste made up for it. And so did the pancakes with strawberry jam dessert.

Comment: Re:Needs more controversy (Score 1, Interesting) 305

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#30563766) Attached to: Critics Call For NASA TV To "Liven Up"
Adding made-up controversy to a technical tv program would be like baking a pizza in a french fries deep-frier. Result might taste great, but the pizza just doesn't fit in it.

This is why I like Man v. Food. No matter if you like sandwiches, hot dogs or hamburgers, I know there will never be anything as good food as hawaiian style pan pizza with barbeque sauce. But the show is entertaining, so I enjoy watching it, while knowing its not always technically correct.

In Naples we used to have these pizza baking competitions between my father and his cousins place next to us. They would give slices of pizzas to everyone walking past and ask which one is better. This usually ended up with them yelling at each other in their white cooking dresses, but more people gathered around to watch what was going on and because it was entertaining, they ended up ordering pizzas too. Win win for all, except for me who had to serve them as a little boy while I would wanted to be playing soccer with my friends.

Comment: Re:IPv6 addresses are overly complex (Score 0) 283

by PizzaAnalogyGuy (#30529502) Attached to: Windows 7 May Finally Get IPv6 Deployed
Hello!

I'm coming from year 4931 and using my time machine, I have traveled here to tell you that this url actually worked. We rolled out ipv6 four years ago.

Now where do I get those delicious Hawaiian pan pizzas... With ham, pineapples, bacon and salami.. With some BBQ sauce, mm..

Eat your delicious pizzas now, because when China soon takes over the world they will make pizza illegal.

See you in future!

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