What do you mean you've never been to Alpha Centauri? Oh, for heaven's sake, mankind, it's only four light years away, you know! I'm sorry, but if you can't be bothered to take an interest in local affairs, that's your own regard. Energise the demolition beams! God, I don't knowâ¦ apathetic bloody planet, I've no sympathy at allâ¦
Hard to believe. What did it use for fuel?
Liquid Fluoride Thorium
...Someone from the back row shouts out "Because our AdSense profile has determined you were visiting websites about cigarettes recently, your health insurance premium has gone up by 5% and you will probably die slightly sooner. Remember, [i]f you have something that you don't want anyone to know, maybe you shouldn't be doing it in the first place!"
Is it cynicism if you're just using a Markov chain to predict what other Slashdotters will say?
(Although obviously this is auto insurance, so I'm sure someone can translate the threat appropriately.)