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Gotta boy, can't think of a good journal entry.

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  • by sulli (195030)
    Congratulations!!
  • I take it you mean your significant other had your kid? Otherwise there IS some sort of conspiracy going on... =)
  • If your boy is anything like mine was, you won't sleep well for at least six months. :)

    LV
  • Congratulations to you both!

    Joey, some tips, based on experience as both son and father:

    1) Always do what your mom says. Don't ask. Don't think. Just do. Until you're a teenager, then try to be nice to her after that. :)

    2) Always listen to your dad's long-winded 'back in my day' stories. I know you're heard 'Back in my day, we watched Star Wars movies in two-dimensions ... and we liked it!' about 5000 times since you could understand English, but let him. The point is that you will be doing the same thing when you're a dad. :)

    3) The reason they'll rag you about homework and getting a part-time job later is that they love you more than anything. It will be hard to imagine, but it will be true.

    4) You need Legos. Lots of Legos. Lots and lots of Legos. Try grandparents for extras. You'll also need a computer real soon, but check with dad on that.

    5) There are bad people in the world. The bad things they do will be scary. This is balanced out by the good people and what they do. And yes, what you do will make a difference.

    6) Never bet on an inside straight. Never split two face cards. Always take the odds in craps and avoid the middle of the table. Betting on red or black is not a 50/50 proposition. Slots are a ripoff.

    7) The people with the red pencils in school have the power. Fighting them by not participating in class means you lose.

    8) Two Words: Monty Python.

    9) If they tease you in high school about being smart and good at various classes, be secure in the thought that we are moving towards a technocracy and you will be all-powerful. A corollary to this is to remember that 4-dimensional /. is just a holographic projection and isn't as important as some people seem to think. ;)

    10) The Earth is important. Do no harm. On the other hand, if something tries to hurt you, feel free to think of yourself first. ;)

    That's it for now. Good luck in this weird new 'being alive thing' and we'll be waiting here online for your first first post. ;)
    • Great advice until:
      8) Two Words: Monty Python.

      This is now 8-b.).

      8-a.) Two Words: Mel Brooks

      Sorry, was born and raise on Mel Brooks, and I revere him as a god in comedy ;-)
      • Oh, yes. For that matter, the Marx Bros. are a must.

        It's one of the coolest aspects of being a parent, being able to introduce neobioforms to all the killer stuff in the world.

        In honor of the current SW hullabaloo, I think I should have added:

        11) Let the Wookie win.

        LOL

        In any case, best of luck to you two, and have fun!
  • I hope you give your children human names... My sister's first kid is Azzurro Thomas Irie Dragon Bumble Spider Azul Zimmerman-Cadmus. My sister is going to have another child in August (gender as yet unknown) and I am scared what it's name will be...
    • Joseph Andrew Marotti II is his name.

      Named after my father (although my wife did consider the name "Orion", all the rest were pretty unique, yet normal).
    • by banky (9941)
      Sweet Jesus.

      My roommate's kid is named Random Burden. No kidding. Short, sweet, and painful.
  • Congrats on your new addition, and boo to the lameness filter.

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment. -- Robert Benchley

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