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FortKnox's Journal: Parenting Tips 17

Journal by FortKnox
Ahh, the laws of neglect.
What does that mean? Well, you can't leave kids in the car by themselves. Like, if you need to run in to pay for the gas you just pumped, there is no choking hazards near the child, and there is no one in the store, you STILL have to get the baby out, and take them with you. Otherwise you can, literally, be arrested and have your child taken away from you. It isn't hard (and a seasoned parent can get their kids outta a carseat in a minute), but its just terribly inconvienent. Especially if you want to pour yourself a cup of coffee.

That leads to my next point. Learn how to do EVERYTHING one-handed. Picking up things, etc... Want practice? Hold a sack of potatoes in one arm and do stuff. And keep in mind that the sack may be a bit light. It isn't too hard until they learn to squirm. Then its impossible.

In other news, Joey took his first steps friday evening to ME, not to my wife. He says "Mama", he pulled up for her while I was at work, so this is the first thing he did just for me, and I get to hold it over my wife's head for a good 20+ years now :-D

Another thing. If you are planning to have kids, give yourself an idea of when its gonna happen. My wedding aniversary is 4/28, wife's b-day is 5/5, joey's b-day is 5/10, and mothers day is 5/11. I'm going to be poor for the month of may.... ;-)
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Parenting Tips

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  • by DaytonCIM (100144) on Monday April 21, 2003 @09:54AM (#5773198) Homepage Journal
    Joey took his first steps friday evening to ME, not to my wife.

    Congrats!!!!! :)
  • by Dephex Twin (416238) on Monday April 21, 2003 @10:19AM (#5773386) Homepage
    I've got it even worse! Valentine's day is 2/14, my two twin sisters' birthday is 2/23, my girlfriend's birthday is 2/24, my dad's birthday is 2/27, and my older sister's birthday is 3/1! I call it "X-mas II".

    When my girlfriend and I are married there will be a strictly enforced no-conceiving-in-November rule.
  • Along with the squirming wait until one day they bite you on the face and then push away from you full force. When that happened to me it was a struggle to keep my daughter from hitting the tile. She giggled, thought it was the funniest thing.

    Congrats on the first steps. Time to child proof the house even further.

    I have to ask, did you see something that brought about this lesson in neglect? Reminds me of two sad but later kind of satisfisying experiences I had.

    The first was at a fast food joint, two kids probably 2 and 4 were running around in February with no shoes on. The 2 yr. old was crying for Mommy. Everyone in the place was trying to ignore them. Then this white trash couple walk in, the 2 yr old ran up to the woman happy to see his mommy. The pair just ignored the kids and started arguing.

    I had to go out to the car and get something, and I see this cop pull up to the drive thru. I told him what I saw, he looked POed and told me he would take care of it. I had my wife with me, and figured she didn't need any grief from that pretty big white trash guy if he saw her there alone again, so we left as the cop was heading to talk to them.

    The second was at a Walmart in the food place inside the store, when my wife was about 7 months pregnant. She saw this lady yelling at her approximately 4 yr old daughter and smacking her because she kept asking for a happy meal. My wife walked up to her and said "Did you know how long I tried to get pregnant? Here you have this beautiful little girl and look at how you treat her, you should be ashamed of yourself."

    Everybody in the place clapped.
    • Well, this morning I had to pickup a half-gallon of milk at the local UDF. The place was empty, and I could have easily stopped and locked the car, ran in, got the milk, payed for it, and got back in the car in under a minute.
      I don't think it would have been neglect. The entire front of the store is glass, and I can see the car the entire trip, so its not like someone could break in or anything.

      I did get Joey out and take him with me (and even got a cup of coffee, too, to prove my skills one-handed), b
    • My wife walked up to her and said "Did you know how long I tried to get pregnant? Here you have this beautiful little girl and look at how you treat her, you should be ashamed of yourself."

      Everybody in the place clapped.

      That's a brilliant story. I'm sure you guys also have stories about complete strangers giving advice to your pregnant wives. One that I remember, my wife was in Target using one of those little scanner guns to register for baby items for shower gifts. This lady was talking loud (I can't

  • I love stumbling across these kind of journal entries. Great stuff! I am not a parent per se, just an uncle to my nephew whos mom is a single parent. Been experiencing some parental misadventures because of it too. Life sure is funny in the skills you develop based on your situation.
  • My wedding aniversary is 4/28, wife's b-day is 5/5, joey's b-day is 5/10, and mothers day is 5/11. I'm going to be poor for the month of may.... ;-)

    I think I have you beat. In one two month period during the winter, we have:

    • My birthday
    • My wife's birthday
    • Child #1 birthday
    • Child #2 birthday
    • Wedding anniversary
    • Thanksgiving
    • Christmas
    • New Years
    • How bout: Mine - 12/22 Wife - 12/23 X-mas eve - 12/24 X-mas day - 12/25 Daughter - 1/9 Not quite as many, but it sure makes Christmas hectic.
    • Hey, if you're a gambling man play those numbers on a lottery. :)
      Unfortunately, statistical calculus was mandatory for CS at my school, so I know how aweful the odds are, so I'll have a better chance of being abducted by a lightning bolt...
      BTW, congrats on the first steps. very cool!
  • This has always been a source of contention between me, and other people that think they know better. Much of the problem involves common sense. As a parent you have to use it all the time. If all parents had common sense and did not leave their kids locked in the car with the windows up on a 100 degree day (or other equally stupid acts of neglect) then normal parents that have common sense would not worry about having their correct judgement second guessed by someone that thought they knew better. This

Blessed be those who initiate lively discussions with the hopelessly mute, for they shall be known as Dentists.

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