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FortKnox's Journal: Parenting: The office experiment? 15

Journal by FortKnox
I meant to tack this on the previous entry, but forgot...

Hardest thing I've had to do as a father:
When Joey does something good, you gotta get enthusiastic about it. Its the whole positive reinforcement thang...

Well, he gets so happy when he takes a dump, he wants mommy to call daddy to tell him. My wife, of course, thinks its a great idea.

This is a big thing, so I have to sound both excited and enthusiastic about it.
I work in a cube farm.

So its kinda fun to see peoples faces when I start saying (with great excitement) "You put poopoo rocks in the potty! I'm so proud of you! If you keep at it, I have some Thomas (toe-mas) tracks to add to your train set!!"

Heh... the horror on the faces of the young people... and the "awww... he's the cutest father" faces from the older ladies is all I see all day.
I probably get redder than a tomato...
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Parenting: The office experiment?

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  • But knowing my wife, I'll be recieving video e-mails about it....
  • I remember one day coming into my son's bedroom to find him painting the wall with poo. I had to resist the urge to freak out, since that could damage the poor kid. I just kinda went, "Well, isn't that.. Interesting. Time to go chobra chobra now, tincek!" (Chobra chobra is 'splash splash' in Slovenian, which lil' Stinky knew to mean it's time to take a bath.)
  • My 2 y/o will fake cough until you tell him he's a good boy for covering his mouth when he coughs. When he actually does cough he does cover his mouth, which is really cute, but then if you don't notice right away he will stand there and wait. If he stands too long he will start woith the fake coughing. He's funny. He's also started recently drinking out of big boy cups. He take that responsibility very seriously. He will go and sit in the kitchen on the floor and drink his 'dooce' till it's gone, then
    • I love all the new words my 20month old is trying out; so far sit sounds like "shit" and I swear to god shovel (she just got a new plastic one) sounds like "asshole" ala The Fockers. No really grandma she is saying "sit" and "shovel". Sheesh :-)
      • teach her to tell the shovel to sit 'sit shovel' ;)
        • Hehe. It is so hard for me not to crack up when she says, "shit dad shit" when she wants me to sit down and play with her.....
      • Someone sent me this [deaper.net] a couple of weeks ago, and I've been dying for an excuse to send it to someone else.
        You parents are the perfect victi^W ones. It's a kid saying "dumptruck" - so they claim, anyway.
        Turn the sound down if you're at work. :)
  • Yr a dad; you have no right to pride anymore. Its Public Embarassment at your expense in the name of yr kids, all the way!
  • Just give excited, generic feedback like "Good job! I'm so proud of you!" or, since you've got the nice kid-made euphemism going on "Oh! I'm so proud of you for making rocks in the [euphemism for potty chair]!"

    Man, I don't even like taking regular phone calls in my cube- I usually walk to a secluded spot or out to my car with my cell phone if I have to. I can't fathom having to say "poo poo rocks" where the people I work with can hear me. :^/

    Just wait 'til the next time somebody sees you coming out of
  • You have made my whole afternoon with your JEs. Thanks! :-)

  • Just let the boy shit free! Why must you force him to conform to your rules, man?

  • when I first started working here I used to get a call and say, "Aww... you made pee pee in the potty and not in your pants, that's so great! I'm proud of you!" People would ask if I had kids. I'd say, "No, but my roommate is a raging alcoholic!" :-)
  • Imagine getting correspondence from him in college.

    Dear dad,
    I put at least three well-sized poopoo rocks in the toilet since last we communicated. Studies are going well. Etc.

    On another note, this journal entry reminded me of the episode of Futurama where the professor used reverse fossilization on Bender to turn him human. And he would tell everybody to come look what he made in the toilet, and somebody would tell him to quit bragging.

    Someone else said to come up with other euphamisms for the toilet

Pie are not square. Pie are round. Cornbread are square.

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