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Comment: Re:without the need for doping (Score 2) 38

Your CPU's obsolete
Because of some skinny sheet
Of Graphene!

Don't know why
Don't know why
Don't know why

When your job ain't no fun
Turn a zero to one
With Graphene!

Don't know why
Don't know why
Don't know why

Apologies to Eric Clapton...

Comment: Re:Now if only... (Score 0) 224

by FatdogHaiku (#48920441) Attached to: YouTube Ditches Flash For HTML5 Video By Default

Before I feed dead mice to my cornsnake I like to say "Yes, my pet, soon you shall feast on RAW FLESH!"

All mice start out raw flesh (with a bit of bone, fur, etc.), so... are you cooking your dead mice? If you visit a pet store you can feed your snake live raw mouse flesh... get a breeding pair and save money. One tip, put the mouse habitat out of sight of the snake habitat... mice get nervous pretty easily.

Comment: Re:Wow .... (Score 4, Funny) 155

Sadly if you RTF[A/S] they say:

We start with egg whites boiled for 20 min at 90 C and return a key protein in the egg to working order.

One key protein does not make an egg.

And we can be thankful for that! Otherwise we'd end up having brunch with some asshat who wants his eggs "unboiled three minutes, served with bearnaise sauce on the side and two slices of sour dough bread toasted to be crisp but not darkened"... and you end up wondering are they going to spit in everyone's food or just his?

Comment: Re:DirectX is obsolete (Score 2) 133

by FatdogHaiku (#48901319) Attached to: DirectX 12 Lies Dormant Within Microsoft's Recent Windows 10 Update

...Android beat them to the punch for "Affordable smartphone OS", while apple beat them to the punch for "Luxury smartphone OS".

...Really, I have to wonder what Microsoft is thinking these days.

They are thinking that there is a total vacuum in the "Magical Smart Phone OS" category...

Comment: Re:Insurance (Score 4, Insightful) 216

Wait, I thought it was about the extra risk of driving passengers around. You're saying money changing hands impacts how often the accidents happen?

Increasing the amount of miles you drive on a daily basis will alter the odds you will be in an accident. Being a for hire service makes the odds of a lawsuit higher. So, more time in traffic, more passengers of unknown temperament expecting commercial quality service and protection, no mandated maintenance or inspections. I would expect commercial insurance and drivers license to be a minimum in every state.
My insurance went up when I reported increasing my miles per year, and I don't have a passenger that will sue on board... I'd also bet there will now be language in your insurance policy that voids all but minimum coverage if you use the vehicle for commercial gain without having previously reported that fact to your insurer. If they write a policy, the type use of the vehicle is stated in the policy, mine has been for years. Non-commercial, no other drivers, under 12,500 miles annually... all in black and white...
I wonder if Uber drivers insurance policies are already actually void due to fine print.

Comment: Re:Just give the option to turn it off... (Score 4, Funny) 820

by FatdogHaiku (#48878953) Attached to: Fake Engine Noise Is the Auto Industry's Dirty Little Secret
I'm working on an app that changes the text input cursor blink rate if your turn signal is on for more than twenty seconds... helps maintain the illusion of driver attentiveness. I have a couple more features to work out (shoe and bicycle part recognition mostly) and then I'll be calling the app "Oh Crap What Did I Just Hit?" Now if I can just tie into the cars backup cam for a screen grab after crashing sounds...

Garbage In -- Gospel Out.