The grandparent was listing jokes, not actual malicious software.
Of course I jest, but which other Windows program anywhere near as popular brings up UAC prompts out of nowhere in the way Java updater does without even being "opened"? I bet Java is partially to blame for a huge number of users blindly clicking "Yes" to all UAC prompts - in the average user's eyes it just won't stop prompting until you accept its damn update.
I was too young for the ICQ era but I can vouch that MSN Messenger was definitely the most popular one in Britain in the 2000s. Never once had to use AIM to talk to someone who wasn't America.
No one IM protocol compares with Facebook on a global scale.
IANAL but a lot of that sounds like it'd might fall foul of the EU-wide Unfair Terms in Consumer Contract Regulations. The bricking definitely.
If I wanted a 3DS I'd still get one regardless. If they bricked my device I'd see them in small claims. Call me overconfident if you want, but living the lifestyle where you're worried about terms that don't look like they'll stand up is quite boring and sometimes expensive.
I recently bought my first Steam game and didn't care about the ToS for the same reason - nothing that looked threatening seemed valid. Yeah they're a US company, but I'm sure they'll have enough presence/assets in the UK to hold accountable (notably there are quite a few terms say things like "May not be valid if you're an EU customer", so it seems they do feel threatened to comply with EU laws at least somewhat).