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Comment Re:identify any potential threats to Earth. (Score 5, Funny) 54 54

Dear Mr. Coward. Although your gesture is very poetic, and indeed almost sexual, it's entirely against protocol.
You can't seriously expect me to accept your offer without orders signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to public inquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat for three months, can you.

Comment Re: weapons, explosives and intimidation? (Score 1) 392 392

I always keep my Swingline stapler on my person because it doesn't bind up as much, and I also keep the staples for the Swingline stapler with me. It's not okay for them to take my stapler, because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire...

Valve Delays Portal 2, Squashes Duke Nukem Rumors 135 135

SKYMTL writes "In a tongue-in-cheek commentary, Valve has announced the delay of Portal 2 and thrown water on the rumor fires regarding its E3 'surprise.' This surprise was rumored to be either Half-Life 3 or the revival of Duke Nukem, and it looks like neither will happen anytime soon."

It is not best to swap horses while crossing the river. -- Abraham Lincoln