Disclaimer: Be warned, what follows is entirely a work of pure and absolute fiction, absolutely none of the following is in anyway true, nor
ever may or likely will be. This post is, and was intended, only and solely as political satire and solely for your personal amusement and
entertainment. Any resemblance to actual events, organizations, people, and places is purely co-incidental and should not be construed as being
based on any actual facts whatsoever. In other words, it ain't at all real. As well, it's long and winded.
Calgary HornBlower - July 1rst 2010 ~ Section E, Page 2
The City Of Calgary Transportation Department today announced a new initiative to analyze transportation costs. Database interoperability will be upgraded to allow the City the authority to access and correlate provincial vehicle registration odometer readings; photo-toll records and vehicle manufacturers service GPS data to be used to determine actual vehicle usage rates. Calgary Transportation has determined that this level of data granularity is required in order to properly understand present and future resource deployment in an efficient and effective manner.Further details concerning this initiative may be found on Calgary Transportation's Information Portal.
Calgary HornBlower - October 13, 2010 ~ City Section Page 3
City Council today approved a tentative schedule and budget for the next stage of Calgary Transportation's Information strategy. In other routine matters...
Calgary HornBlower - December 20, 2010 - Main Section Page 7
City Council posted a series of initiatives on next years budget agenda,
including ... funding for the next stage of Calgary Transportation's IS
Calgary HornBlower - April 1rst, 2011 ~ City Section Page 1
In a relatively one-sided vote, City Council today gave final approval to
the 2011 budget, among the items going ahead are ... and Calgary
Transportations Westbrook and Spruce Cliff LRT stations, new interchanges
at 16 Ave - 19th St and 90 Ave and 14 St SW, as well as the new IS system.
Alberta Transport News - May 9th, 2011, Page Four
Press Release - Calgary Transportation, a leader in blah blah blah blah
blah, today announced the first tests of the new IS system have been completed and the results have been positive. CT is now moving into the
Calgary HornBlower - July 1rst 2011 ~ Section E, Page 2
Today CT announced the first of several initiatives designed to lower the
infrastructure costs associated with the City's growth, Several
partnerships with private industries will be established. This will allow
us to fund several necessary projects ahead of schedule and will provide
CT with the specialized expertise needed to implement a comprehensive
integrated transportation system.
Calgary Moon, Nov 11, 2011 ~ Page Six
Though details are still to be worked out and official announcements won't
be made until later this year, the much-criticized proposal to have a
private developer design, build, own and lease back the new transportation
corridor, the so-called West East Super-Way, is now a go.
Calgary HornBlower - July 1rst 2012 ~ Section E, Page 2
The HornBlower has learned that as part of the new CalTran IS systems
capabilities, each household will now be provided with a detailed
breakdown of the transportation costs per vehicle on a monthly basis.
Furthermore CalTran has shown that there are significant costs associated
with vehicle usage during peak periods and specific to the type of vehicle
used. As part of the IS initiative, vehicle occupancy data is being
considered as a useful addition to the data already procured from Motor
Vehicle Department and could easily be correlated with the vehicle's
position. CalTran plans to use this information to allocate MOVs more
lanes during peak periods and in upgrading the predications and warnings
available to drivers via the Critical Roadway Alert System. (CRAS)
Calgary Moon Jan 31, 2012, ~ Page 5
In a late breaking announcement, City Council has voted to allow the bid
to start for the a proposed private high speed corridor under the CNP
right of way. CNP predicts it can have a major impact on high traffic
levels if it's allowed to develop the state of the art guided private
The Planet - Sept 1rst, 2013 ~ Section: Alberta Page 1
Today, after bitter debate, Council narrowly passed a bill that allows
CalTran to bill companies and individuals for abusive or excessive roadway
use. Commercial traffic in residential areas after hours, single occupancy
vehicles in MOV lanes, excess weight, and trucks on non-truck routes will
be charged according to the following fee schedule...
Calgary HornBlower - July 1rst 2013 ~ Section 2, Page 2
Privacy advocates today raised serious concerns over the sale of vehicle
patterns to the Insurance Council Of Canada. "It is our belief that this
system has the potential to be seriously misused by the client firms of
the council", said a spokesperson in a prepared statement. Meanwhile,
ISUC, the Insurance Society Of Upper Canada reiterated it's stance that
the data would not be used to profile individuals, rather specific types
of vehicles and usage patterns.
Calgary HornBlower - July 1rst 2015 ~ Section 2, Page 1
Today Council approved the privatization of road construction and
maintenance with the caveat that the City Of Calgary remain the sole
shareholder. The head of CalTran stated that this was a necessary step if
the current traffic situation was to improve. Citing higher than
anticipated demand and expense, the best option, he said is to let the
traffic network generate funds based on usage. The current system unfairly
advocates resources, he said, citing the last GO plan study. Several
companies, including CNP, Macro$mart Canada and WestRocket have approached
the City in regards to these proposals.
The Planet & Post - June 20th, Business Section, Page One
After the highly successful event, CalTran Corporation or CTC's new board
of directors issued the following statement...
Calgary HornBlower Offline - July 1rst 2015 ~ Section 1, Page 4
Today CTC unveiled the new Driver Information Portal and the new monthly
statement which will be included in with the utility and parks statements.
This information will provide Calgarians with an accurate picture of the
costs associated with Transportation. CTC hopes this information will
allow drivers to more intelligently use transportation resources and in so
doing will lower the current high demands placed on the corporation.
The Regional - Prairies Edition, November 6th, 2015 ~ Transportation Page
Under the new arrangement, the Mayor says almost half of the $500-billion
price-tag for the corridor will be provided by a private concern with the
other half, or more than half, expected to be funded by interest-bearing
fixed-rate savings bonds that Calgarians would have the first chance at
purchasing. Furthermore, the bond would offer taxpayers an RRSP tax break.
Neighborly News February 15th, 2016 ~ Page Two
After some debate, Council voted to send CTC's proposal for a basic
monthly usage fee levied on drivers, back to the revenue and resources
committee for further study. As well...
Calgary HornBlower - July 1rst 2017 ~ Section E, Page 2
A number of motorists failed to get to work on time today after their
vehicles refused to start. CT blames the problem on a Macro$mart software
upgrade gone awry and says the problem was resolved quickly and the
affected motorists vehicles returned to service in the shortest possible
time... Macro$mart denied it's software was to blame citing a study
showing that flaws in the open source Joe language were largely to blame
for instabilities in ZP.
The Calgary Moon March 3rd 2017 Headline: Another Hike! ~ Page One
Today CTC applied for a rate increase to cover the cost of the new outer
ring CTrain expansion. Citing steady growth in the numbers of Transit
users, CTC again stressed the need for an increase in the PTR (Personal
Calgary HornBlower - July 4rst 2017 ~ Business Section, Page One
CTC today announced a partnership with Macro$mart Floppyware. Macro$mart
Canada defended the purchase as good business and said it clearly
demonstrated it's commitment to community infrastructure development and
support ... In a related story the WES road has been renamed the MES road,
after a generous donation from Macro$mart's founder ...
Deal Finder News Online August 2018 Edition ~ Page 66
Dismissing the number of complaints from motorists who have not been able
to settle their accounts, a spokesperson from M$-CTC stated that the fee
scheduled was approved by City Council and those with concerns should be
expressing them to their alderman. M$-CTC is operating fully with in the
guidelines established by council...
Calgary HornBlower Offline - December 1rst, 2020 ~ Section D, Page 8 ... and under the new proposal, delinquent vehicles can be sold to cover
outstanding M$-CTC monthly upgrade and licensing fees...
Calgary HornBlower - July 1rst 2020 ~ Section 2, Page 3
M$-CTC angrily denied today that the inability to drive was a serious
concern giving the alternatives provided by the company. The spokesperson
went on to say that all drivers with overdue accounts had full access to
an managerial appeal panel, therefore no further work hours extensions or
light traffic road allowances could be granted until all patches and
upgrades were purchased, countersigned and installed ...
Calgary HornBlower - Sept 1rst 2020 ~ Headline
Fatal Exception Error causes city wide crash. Details to follow as soon as staffing levels return to normal.