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While it might be cool to get something ASAP, there will be people building net launchers with a fishing line recoil setup. This could revitalize the fishing equipment industry with auto-tracking "casting" devices... you know, for fishing.
Sky Fishing...

Kang will eat Starlight Glimmer... and not in a good way...

I've heard you get a much faster response with the Dunkin' Doughnuts app...
but your rescuers my have frosting on their fingers and jelly on their shirts...

and impressive testicles...

Interestingly, the document he is quoting was drafted without a "Sign Anonymously" option...

A reread is not a waste of time...
http://www.ushistory.org/declaration/document/.

It appears to be strong enough to break the slashdot RSS feed... every link goes to a "Moved Permanently" page with yet another link... the quake must have shifted some bits around in storage...

That could set flare bartending competition back years...
On the upside sales of Clorox Wipes would skyrocket!

That's not something you hear often...
Possibly do to low repeat sales...

Their shiny new centrifuge bearings seize up, ruining a few hundred thousand dollars worth of equipment, and they end up waiting 20 minutes for help from a Manila call center?

Well, if they chose to attack a person using such a method then the punishment should fit the crime...
They get a dangerous and unnecessary surgery of their very own...
via dialup...
with no firewall...
using a system running Windows ME...

That last one might be a step too far. (damn, I ran out of ellipsis!)

I liked it better the other way...
That's him officer, the guy with the head that looks like a cheap LED candle! Be careful, he's very evil...

That was incentivization, not restrictive action. It's one thing to help someone replace an old car and another to disallow them for daily use... not seeing it coming may indicate a lack of foresight. Once that happens off lease and certified used cars with warranties will be gold...

I would also not be surprised to see a stratification of drivers licensees with known, long term non-aggressive drivers allowed in traffic with autonomous cabs and buses while those who like to use their vehicle's potential to it's fullest or use driving for emotional expression may be limited as to where we can drive.
[Disclaimer: I may be in the latter group at times]

Obviously at that point shade tree mechanics (no matter how fancy a tree they have) and hotrodders will be out of the question.

Sales is all they understand. Now they would like to force you to use them for service. Next it will be "Remove all cars more than X years old because of pollution ( I know, you think a car manufacturer would not touch that topic, but they will) and safety issues. The only thing you can do is convert an old car to electric (and they will scream about safety for that too) and not buy a car under the new terms.

From a legislative point of view, an automobile conveys more personal freedom than anything other than weapons. Therefor it will be constrained, (you can only drive this or that type of vehicle) then limited (i. e. mass transit or autonomous-cabs for the masses), then restricted (as in "Hey you middle class,go huddle with the masses") until only the elite have actual freedom of movement.

Jeez, I'm surprised they didn't tack on voltage drop as a multiplier somewhere...

Dear Customer,
While delivering your power we encountered a voltage drop which adversely impacted our overall ampacity. There will of course be a surcharge for this.