Bender was her copilot, and he wants his shiny metal ass back.

How about we give points to both sides:

Points to GOP: The Earth's temperature is volatile such that man-made changes to it are not really anything new or unique*.

Points to Dems: Increases in CO2 provably cause the temperature to rise.

* Sub-counter-point: The changes will f$ck over human society either way.

Back then I didn't need to charge my electric fence to keep the kids off my lawn.

That's another 10 years in school :-)

The total mass & gravity of the (ex) moon would remain the same if it became a black hole.

Less dramatic than a ship. Sometimes you have to use showmanship to get people to pay attention, even if it's technically less accurate or logical.

Quantum Rube Goldberg Device...or is that redundant?

God typed "Run Idiots_Beta.exe"

Don't we do this every morning when we put our pants on?

We're supposed to wear pants? No wonder I just got a pay cut.

so it's like using Intel CPU's

Yes, but there may be something about the atmosphere or environment up there that mitigates the effects. I don't think it's likely, but the probability is greater than zero.

Ideally, we'd do such experiments on the moon or Mars instead of Earth.

One of these days humanity will get the Galactic Darwin Award.

"Here at the LHC, News 9 is about to witness the first ever batch of artificial mini black holes. Here comes the first one now...oh shi~ ^& [NO CARRIER]

Time to invade Microsoft!

The teacher had to sell it to the principle that it was merely an "instant human biology lesson".

has been using weaponized PowerPoint files

I've been telling the suits that PowerPoint will put an eye out, and now I have proof