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Comment book-a-minute summaries (Score 5, Funny) 186

The Eye of the World (Book 1):

Rand al'Thor
        Tam is my father.

(Nothing happens. Then, nothing happens. Then, unexpectedly, nothing happens. Everything is FRAUGHT with PORTENT.)

Moiraine
        Everybody come with me.

Everybody
        No. Well, ok.

(They travel a LOT. Something happens that isn't explained. Something happens that doesn't make sense. Something happens.)

Rand al'Thor
        Tam is my father.

THE (predictable, cliched, dumb) END

The Great Hunt (Book 2):
Rand al'Thor

        I want to do something. But doing this something is probably what the Aes Sedai want me to do, so I will do something else. But doing that something else may be what they want me to do, because they think I think they want me to do the first thing, so I'll decide to do this other thing instead. So I'll just do the first thing, since I want to do it anyway. Screw them.

(Repeat seven hundred times.)

THE END

The Dragon Reborn (Book 3):
Rand al'Thor
        Being the Dragon Reborn stinks. I'm out of here.

(Moiraine and the gang CHASE him. But even though they are on HORSES, and he is WALKING, they never CATCH UP. This is supposed to be MYSTERIOUS but is really just a plot CONVENIENCE for Robert JORDAN.)

Perrin
        I hate wolves.

(Mat and others show up out of NOWHERE. This is supposed to be MYSTERIOUS but is really just a plot CONVENIENCE for Robert JORDAN.)

Rand al'Thor
        I am the Dragon Reborn. (kills the EVIL SUPREME BAD GUY)

Robert Jordan
        Fooled you! That wasn't really the EVIL SUPREME BAD GUY! Now I can write forty more books!

THE END

The Shadow Rising (Book 4):

(Everybody HATES Rand, so he BEATS them until they OBEY.)

Rand
        I have conquered all sorts of stuff, because I rule.

(Gibbers to self. Five hundred pages pass.)

THE END

The Fires of Heaven (Book 5):

Rand
        I found an artifact which gives me limitless power. I think I shall brick it up behind a wall.

(A female character SNIFFS and thinks about her NECKLINE.)

THE END

Lord of Chaos (Book 6):

Rand
        I have a secret plan, but I won't tell you about it.

THE END

A Crown of Swords (Book 7):

Rand
        Now my secret plan shall be unleashed! Here it is. Are you ready? Are you sure you're ready? I'm going to make it look like I'm attacking this guy. But THEN I will attack some OTHER guy.

(He DOES, and it ALMOST WORKS.)

THE END

The Path of Daggers (Book 8):

Mazrim Taim
        I am evil, yaargh! Fear me!

Spooky Voice of Lews Therin
        Rand, kill Taim.

Rand
        Being powerful sucks. I will brood.

THE END

Winter's Heart (Book 9):

Perrin
        I was going to rescue my wife, but that will have to wait for the next book.

Mat
        I was going to escape with my friends, but that will have to wait for the next book.

Egwene
        I was going to attack Tar Valon, but that will have to wait for the next book.

THE END

Crossroads of Twilight (Book 10):
(Rand BROODS and DREAMS about his THREE WOMEN.)

Minor Characters
        There is a large use of the One Power over there. (repeat indefinitely)

Perrin
        I was going to save my wife, but that will have to wait for the next book.

Egwene
        I was going to attack Tar Valon, but I won't finish it until the next book.

Mat
        I might flirt with Tuon in the next book.

THE END

New Spring (Book 11):

Reader
        I was going to wait for the next book, but that will have to wait for the next book.

THE END

Comment Re:mac != unix (Score 1) 699

All of the other ones I've seen have a web interface which can be controlled via curl or links scripts. For example, I had a buffalo router that would eventually get into a state such that it would not reconnect to the DSL modem when the connection was reset, so I had a script to check the state of the internet connection and force the router to reconnect (or reboot itself if that didn't work).

You can't do that with the airport line of routers.

Comment Re:mac != unix (Score 2, Informative) 699

Try to load /Library/Preferences/com.apple.loginitems.plist in vim and tell me if that is an xml file. However there is a converter that can convert non-xml (binary) plists to xml format, so it doesn't matter that much.

The point still remains that there are configuration items that cannot be changed outside of the GUI (not everything is represented in plists as far as I can tell). I would love to be proven wrong in this.

Another example outside of my list above isn't exactly OSX, but it is close. The Airport Extreme router cannot be remotley restarted or configured without using the proprietary GUI. I came close by doing some applescript that I invoke from the shell, but that doesn't work all of the time.

Comment Re:mac != unix (Score 1) 699

Not all of them are xml!

-[jeff@whitecloak]--<10:33 AM:Fri Apr 03>-
-(0:~)-: ls -al /Library/Preferences/com.apple.loginitems.plist
-rw-r--r-- 1 root admin 906 2009-04-01 19:59 /Library/Preferences/com.apple.loginitems.plist
-[jeff@whitecloak]--<10:33 AM:Fri Apr 03>-
-(0:~)-: file /Library/Preferences/com.apple.loginitems.plist
/Library/Preferences/com.apple.loginitems.plist: Apple binary property list
-[jeff@whitecloak]--<10:33 AM:Fri Apr 03>-
-(0:~)-: cat /Library/Preferences/com.apple.loginitems.plist
bplist00&#209;^privilegedlist&#210;ZController_CustomListItems&#162;&#212;
_com.apple.loginitem.legacyprefs&#210;TPathTHide_-/Library/Printers/hp/hpio/HPEventHandler.app/Q0O&#208;&#208;&#196;&#203;f$H+&#182;&#191;&#249;?&#192;r&#192;E    &#255;&#254;&#255;&#255;&#255;&#255;&#182;&#191;&#167;a&#248;U&HPEventHandler.appMacintosh HD+Library/Printers/hp/hpio/HPEventHandler.app/&#255;&#255;^HPEventHandler&#212;
&#210;_N/Library/Application Support/Hewlett-Packard/Software Update/HP Scheduler.app/O&#236;&#236;&#196;&#203;f$H+&#229;q&#229;&#192;=U         &#255;&#254;&#255;&#255;&#255;&#255;&#229;q&#210;&#207;EU"HP Scheduler.appMacintosh HDLLibrary/Application Support/Hewlett-Packard/Software Update/HP Scheduler.app/&#255;&#255;\HP Schedule*<?HMdjo&#179;&#184;&#189;&#194;&#242;&#244;&#199;&#214;&#223;&#226;&#231;8'4-[jeff

Comment Re:mac != unix (Score 3, Interesting) 699

Really? I love doing everything from the command line, but am unsure how to do the following (at least I can't find anything after scouring google for some of these). Is it possible to do the following? I just picked some from looking at the system preferences pane:

* Time Machine: Configure what to back up
* Time Machine: Restore files
* Configure Parental Controls
* Change an account's picture
* Configure an account's login options
* Configure when to put the monitor/computer to sleep
* Change the desktop background
* Change the screensaver
* Configure the sounds
* Spotlight: Configure what to index
* Configure filevault settings
* Disable automatic login

I'm aware that some of them may be achievable by editing plists, but of those, the plist may not be in a human-readable format. Others I don't know where to change those settings outside of the GUI.

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