It never ceases to amaze how these clueless idiots get so high up. On two separate occasions I have sat (with my cap in hand trying to scrounge contracts) and smiled agreeably while they say things like "People don't want games that take more than an hour in a play-session" (Empire Interactive Exec) and "People don't want games where you fight with swords." (Ian sodding Livingstone no less) - its clear that Frank is cut from the same empty-suit cloth. He will do well in the games industry and, I predict, will very soon start his own consultancy firm providing market insight to outsiders with more money than sense. You watch and see...

Sorry to put a dampener on your scepticism but here in Scotland, with the help of some fairly vocal and very talented teachers, we're getting some genuine momentum going. Official support from Nintendo is great news. Find out more here if you're actually interested: http://www.handheldlearning.co.uk/content/view/46/60

But, for a lot of the younger generation a platformer means Super Mario Bros just as a hoover means a vacuum cleaner. While not anywhere near the legal definition of a generic trademark, there really are no other 2d platformers that they will have been exposed to.

Jesus, the De-Rez guys are so eye-piercingly bad at comic timing. First two minutes are watching someone watching Yahtzee's videos and then putting a hat on. There. 2 minutes of your life saved.

In fact, the rest is a sequence of mistimed and lukewarm overreaction gags. Now go watch something good instead. Enrich your life. You're free!