Other famous Microsoft Moments In Time (MMITs) that were not Actual Problems:

= 8.3 filenames
= Microsoft Bob
= Windows XP security
= Microsoft Windows Vista, *.*
= Microsoft advertisement in which Seinfeld asks Bill Gates to "adjust his shorts"
= Microsoft Zune, whether brown or not
= Chief Executive Orificer, Squirts Ballmer, *.*
= Microsoft advertisement for the Surface tablet in which ungraceful, robotic people coordinate senseless movements that no one would ever do in reality... if anyone bought a Surface tablet in reality

Demon-Haunted World - Sagan

Portable Atheist - Hitchens

Unpopular Essays - Russell

Once a mind has escaped ignorance, there are plenty of laughs to be had at the expense of tribalism and tradition. There's your whimsy, too. (o;

I don't love Microsoft, its tools, its "solutions", its idiotic advertising, or Squirts Ballmer, but you need to evaluate reality more accurately.

Microsoft is a large, rich, powerful company with a MONOPOLY. They have a pinhead for a Chief Executive Orificer and they are having difficulty finding new successes in a difficult economic climate. They are not alone. BUT... It would take catastrophic global circumstances on a scale yet unseen to wound Microsoft mortally.

In the spirit of forgiveness and magnanimity, Linus has offered not to call anyone a "fucking moron who should kill himself" this Christmas.

Don't screw up the peace and goodwill, people, or there will be hell to pay!

He could be Canadian, you insensitive clod!

No wonder 7 billion simians just throw more poo.

Ageism is based on two things:

= Old Person wants a quality of life and stability

= Old Person is expensive in both salary and benefits

If you want quality of life, you are too old.

What HTML5 giveth, hath not yet arrived.

Research opportunities -- maybe at the PhD level, but the private sector doesn't like to hire software PhDs for a good reason.

Highly skilled mentors and teachers -- who are counting on their university pensions instead of learning what's happening in the real world of software development. I don't blame them for seeking safety, but let's not pretend that 90% of professors are "highly skilled mentors and teachers".

Real-world community -- of people who are just as lost. Might as well used Reddit.

Regular social contact with relatively capable people -- Based on statistical understanding alone, I must declare this point to be bovine excrement.

Oh, so the villain in this movie goes *further* than creating a monopoly, using its power to force suppliers to put competitors out of business, using a file-system hack to implement long filenames, having Notepad write a BOM to UTF-8 files, and, finally, choosing Ballmer to run the business into the ground?

How will Bond ever defeat a villain with such technical skill?

Dawkalds-Torvins: It's very evident that Representative Paul Broun is a fucking moron who should kill himself. Only fucking morons would vote for a fucking moron like that. There was a rather amusing tweet I saw on Twitter, which went something like this. "[Patient:] Doctor, I think smearing chocolate on my teeth is a good way to keep them healthy. [Doctor:] Here's a punch in the mouth, you fucking moron!" Whom do I have to fuck to make people understand that there is no controversy about evolution? It's a fact, demonstrated beyond all possible doubt by scientific evidence. If you look at the evidence and don't see that it's an absolutely secure fact, you are a fucking moron who probably would like using Gnome.

Input: "Where we see important opportunities to set a new standard, yeah we'll dive in."

Output: "We'll copy any product if it's a chance to make money. And if we can figure out how to squirt Windows into it, we'll do that, too."

The IBM Blue Ballmer Project is an artificial intelligence computer system capable of translating statements made in the unnatural language of Microsoft Chief Executive Orificer Steve Ballmer.

XP is still common at work because

a) it is fast even on old hardware,

b) it is supported by at least one good, secure Web browser (hint: not MSIE),

c) it supports about 15 years worth of professional applications (some of which are not available anymore), and

d) upgrading == (pain + time) && (upgrading != c)