not just a locker room attendant but... an elderly locker room attendant
Well, I bet he'll never work again.
Nor need to.
The National Felons League (an organization of Billionaire Team Owners that is considered non-profit so that it pays no taxes) is just looking for an excuse here. The patriots were laughed at when they tried to pull the temperature excuse out of their ass, so they want a University to back up the "pressure goes down with temperature" excuse. They need to do this because even die hard Patriot fans are not buying the "a locker room attendant did this all on his own" story. And lets completely ignore why this supposed temperature drop affected only one teams footballs and not those provided by the other team, or why the problem was only observed when the opposition intercepted a ball and not by any of the Patriot players as they handled the balls.
You don't help Alibaba by pointing out what they already know. I'm certainly not going to defend the Electronic Bay of Thieves' business pratices, but Alibaba has built their business on telling you that you are dealing with crooks. They go to great lengths to warn you that the people they hook you up with are not trustworthy and that they will hold your money in escrow for you, while warning you never to deal with the seller directly. Then, when you get cheated, they always side with the seller.
Don't try to kid us that they didn't know crooked things like fraud merchandise is going on. Only in the case of Alibaba it is as likely to be counterfeit SD memory cards or chips as it is to be designer fashions.
In Soviet Moscow the police track YOU!
just like they do here.
"May your future be limited only by your dreams." -- Christa McAuliffe