You know what's better than free wifi at Atlanta's airport? Avoiding Atlanta's airport.

There have been too many problems with existing crypto code so I've developed something better: goatsecret. Instead of relying on math, it relies on a frenchman's gaping asshole. Basically, the software breaks your message/file/whatever into small chunks and superimposes the data in the goatsecret image. Sure, it's not encrypted, but who is going to stare into the void just to get your data? No hacker/cracker/big business/three-letter-agency is that desperate.

Are you high? Not even php is retarded enough to do that. It's a compiled language. String interpolation happens at compile time.

Cross platform is wearing three condoms and then butt fucking, to abstract away the differences between men and women. It's usually a shitty experience for the user (though some people seem to prefer it).

ehh, I tried using perl for a small "modern" (REST) backend, gave up and used ruby/sinatra/mod_passenger because it worked. Perl? Dancer looked nice but there are too many dependencies. CGI is hopelessly obselete (does /. still run on it?). I implemented my own microwebframework on top of CGI (a hundred lines or so to do routing) before I discovered passenger and switched to that.

I'd take perl over node anytime but I'm not impressed by CPAN (it's better than npm, if you want some faint praise) and a lot of the code and culture is stuck in the 80s/90s.

Huh? Still no UTF-8 support? Damn. A couple years ago they hired a hotshot perl programmer with 30 years of UTF-8 experience to implement it. Hired him off Dice.com, in fact. Oh, hmmm. Well, ASCII is good enough.

Heh, reminds me of the Thomas Jefferson quote (paraphrased) "When people fear the government, you have tyranny. When the government fears the people, you have tyranny."

Too many secrets.

I watched sneakers a couple days ago (it's on netflix) and nearly shit my pants at the end when Robert Redford reveals the magic decryptor box isn't for spying on the russians, it's "for spying on us". (Of course, they meant the NSA was spying on the FBI/CIA but still... future predicted).

OpenSSL is the shiniest meat bicycle. Are you the conductor of the poop train? It's time to strip the flesh and salt the wounds.

Do you know why IE used a different DOM event model than everyone else? (attachEvent vs addEventListener, etc.) It's because they implemented an early draft and then never went back and updated it. Why should they? Their customers are locked in!

Well, HTTP 2.0 is DOM Events 2.0! IE and IIS will support HTTP 2.0 while the rest of the world scraps it (it's a turd in need of flushing) to work on HTTP 3.0.

lol, yeah, I remember him. I also remember doing jaeger shots at the geek compound with Eric "Surprised by Wealth" Raymond. IIRC, that night he was surprised by tacosnotting. I haven't vomitted that hard, before or since.

Prosecutors don't like that so they overcharge defendants. Most people (the numbers are pretty shocking) take a plea bargain. No jury, no trial.

At the end of the day, I'd rather be writing web applications in Python than PHP.

"At the end of the day, I'd rather be a prison bitch for the aryan brotherhood than for the colombians." Me, I'd rather not be in prison.

Wind power and concentrated solar power are quite good at killing birds, including endangered and legally protected species.

Like John F. Kennedy Jr? Fact: he was killed by a drone strike after George Bush secretly approved his targeted murder. Of course you won't hear about it because it was secret and there was no trial. Follow the power - John John was planning on running for the Senate in New York (after Daniel Moynihan retired). After he died, Hillary Clinton was elected instead. Of course, it turns out they fucked themselves over. Hillary was supposed to be elected President in 2008 but that obviously didn't happen. If Hillary had waited and run for Senate in Illinois (the backup plan), there wouldn't have been a Senator Obama and she would have been elected President in 2008.