As I read and read and read
some of this life and some of that
As we listen with intent, hanging eyes
without forming words
or facing fears

As I sit, and re...
again,
with added colors and twisted frames
I know what you mean
I know it so well...
as i say and write... or just let it breath

(based on a news in todays Paper)
(COMMENTS: abrupt, and aimless.. focus)
Mudassara is a small dark-skinned girl of average looks. She is the quiet kind, and wears the invisibility hat; except, she knows of its curse. On a fine spring morning, she can stand with five other girls and never get noticed.

0001 hrs
OAKDF Office, Abottabad.

For the past one week I have been volunteering/living with OAKDF. This has been and educating, frustrating, unproductive, comforting, tiring, a strange mix of a week.
My desire to do something meaningful for the earthquake releif efforts has remained, in a way, unfulfilled, largely because of my own laziness and inability to contribute in a usefull and productive manner. However, the last few days have taught me a lot. The determination and the

smiles at the unwelcomed joke and then furiously embarrassed by the ease-ness, turns red. It. With hollow hatred and despair, looks at its feet.

My horse ran over the village elder and is currently on the loose. People in the district are advised to excercise extreme caution while taking out the garbage as the new stinkonometer will strike down on those who throw away cold pizza.
The wish is trapped in the cold cave of nirasha. Tears will run, run by the qanat, but the shouts will be clinging to my nose. How I must....

. Is it better to put this down here or to blurt it out for tiny paper clowns?

It is what it turns out to be
A same story
With same names,
And masks and floors

It turns out the same
With lame names
With blue beards and nylon cranes

Weary
of wearing Red
and blue socks
Holding a thumb to her head
Leaving slow marks--
dark, right and right below

We write, you and I

Liverpool won; the most amazing comeback.
But a bomb attack in Isb... ppl died...

As I watch the score
and adjust my tie,
People die

...........

A Hope and a smile,
On a sad afternoon,

A Wish in the sky,
glowing, infecting...
illusion of love and madness in view

And evil care
It.
talk your song
On and on
Mumbling rants and
voices of long
Shout.

I have
Not listened to this merman rant before.
'Please clear the way'
For my tail
So I can sweep the floor.

Phir wohee, phir waheeN,

1713 hrs (Office)

This has been an eventfull year. A long year if counted by the events. But first a look at the resolutions that I made:

1. Visit India--get hooked up with an indian gal --- Went to India, great trip; enjoyed it a lot. Couldnt hookup with any gal wat so ever :-)
2. Improve my Erdös number from infinity to 3(via Sarmad) --nope
3. Go to Europe--watch a champions league/euro football match. --nope

...before you know to-o many have died.

I write of peace, love, and life. I write of pain, death, and disease. I shout like him-- a madman,a politician,a poser, a clergyman and her. I sleep like the conscience, guilt, like blood and God. I think of love, death, heaven and earth, and my image in a thousand mirrors. I smile like the child, the winner, the tyrant. I breathe a flame thrower, and a gas chamber, and a cloud of dust and crap. I hear shouts of joy, pain, defeat, malign, wisdom

0320 hrs (Home)
Vanita came an interviewed my father. It was an unusall event, but she told me that it was a great interview. She was impressed by my father's knowledge of things. All in all it was a pleasant event. Met her again after the interview. Nice cheerfull and healthy chat. Its good.
Been spending some time with Sarmad. The other day heard Rinku and Sarmad discussing a lot of issues. Starting from Evolution, moving on to religion and then to feminism. A lot of interesting view

2300 hrs(home)
Happy New Year
Here they are:

1. Visit India--get hooked up with an indian gal
2. Improve my Erdös number from infinity to 3(via Sarmad)
3. Go to Europe--watch a champions league/euro football match.
4. Prove something significant
5. Run a marathon
6. Play football, start a football academy.
7. Shave my head and beard
8. Break someones something
9. Read more... less tv
10. Think more...less hallucination
11. Write

2220 hrs (home)
I posted this yesterday as well. Atleast I did write it all up.

1730(work)
Nani amma is better and is back at home. All my khallas and mamoos are/were in lahore.

Semester TAship going good, so far all tasks completed, but the toughest lies ahead. Must study and work harder.

14:25(work)
capt ahmed latif was in lahore. Although he had a lot of interesting things to share, but those are not going to be the topic of my journal entry. There was this brief momentary discussion as we were going from lakhshmi to mall road in his brothers car...about death and disease