Your post is actually more funny than you got credit for. Jim Nabors applauds you.

Except that he's *NOT* in jail.... He's under HOUSE ARREST. I think he should be in jail. Certainly, he didn't actually physically walk to the banks and cram cash into large cloth bags with a giant dollar sign on them... He probably did all of this banking over the phone. He could still do more damage from his house. He should be chained to a metal chair in a damp basement with a single incandescent bulb hanging from the ceiling. Instead, he's probably watching HBO in his living room eating caviar.

Yeah, that's great now, but after reading this in the news, Pizza Hut will see a large increase in "911! Help! I need Chicken wingz!@@!@!"

Why does the shutdown even have to be "nice"? Ripping the power cord from the back of the machine ought to do it.

I'm betting that the bios in your old 8088 didn't support High-Density floppy drives. I also came up against this limitation. There were various dos device drivers with command line options to try to override the track/sector count of the drives, but without a supporting bios, those are all useless.

Do I still qualify as a Digital Native?

Inherently, all humans are analog.... But we invented digital. The only true Digital Native would be an AI. Most of them are complete morons and can barely hold a conversation while staying on topic for more than 180 seconds. Even the best AI that I can think of is IBM's Watson, and so far, all he can do is answer trivia questions on Jeopardy.

Both of my parents are retired and on a fixed income. Both of them use dial-up (they don't live together). I have tried to encourage them to get the benefits of broadband, but they are just too stubborn and continue to say "I just don't need it". So, here is the real news flash: Old people don't like to change.

Buy a Raspberry Pi 2 for less than half that. Good gaming fun and more.

The whole point of ransomware is that you PAY MONEY to get your files back. If there was any chance that the victim didn't believe that you would return all the data, then they would not pay. If one person paid the ransom and then found that not all the files were returned, or that something else was affected as you suggest, then word of mouth and rumors would spread about that particular strain of ransomware, and then NOBODY would pay the ransom.... They would all just restore from backups (which is ideally what they all should do anyway). This would seriously reduce the bad guys' income. They won't do something that would so obviously affect their bottom line.

It's spelled "LAWN".

As any field medic will tell you, it's always nice to have a clean flat strip of Gaza.

Since most phones run at the same resolution as a desktop ... WTF is the purpose of a badly written mobile site?

Even if your phone's resolution matches your desktop resolution, the display is much smaller. Text that would normally be viewable on a desktop is infinitesimally small on your phone. Sure, you can zoom it, but then you're changing the way the website works because you are viewing just a small part of the page through a magnifier.

The real issue here is accessibility options for impaired users. Even mobile sites need to have text large enough for you to see....

You know what else solves the "not enough IP addresses" problem? NAT.

And it's a lot less of a change than switching to IPv6.

What most people fail to realize is that the FM receiver in your cell phone is really only useful if you have headphones plugged into your cellphone. This is not for audio purposes: The headphone wire acts as an FM antenna in order to tune into any stations. Without the headphones, all you get is static.

So, in an emergency situation, bring your headphones!

...And when you have a cart full of stuff, you take it to the checkout where a minimum wage idiot cannot even work the register, and the line is so long it takes you 30 minutes to get through it, and when it finally *IS* your turn, he gets a phone call and starts talking to his buddy.

Just last week I only had a couple of items, so I used the self checkout. The line generally moves faster because it's one line to four terminals. The self-checkout overseer waved me up and rang up my few items at his podium. I was very impressed with his initiative and willingness to adapt. You just don't get that at $7/hr.