What? I've had several hardware failures on Macs over the years, and the *longest* was a five day wait -- the second longest a two day wait, and every other failure was a same day or next day fix.
That five day wait was with a moderately aged (2.5 years: out of warranty) Mac Pro having a motherboard failure and they had run out of replacements in-house, so they sent out for new ones and it took a few days to get there. They got more then just mine in on that shipment, so someone else comes in tomorrow, next week, they will have a one day turnaround. Its worth noting that the mac is still going two+ years later with no other issues after that replacement.
That repair cost me not a dime. There are worst-case scenarios with Apple where you may be sans a machine a few days, a week maybe -- *MAYBE* even two weeks, but that seems to require a level of outdated hardware that you're better served going to an independent repair shop -- but it is *absolutely* untrue that the general, average component failure of a "vendor built" machine, if built by Apple, has you out for two weeks.
It doesn't happen. Apple Stores can do a huge number of component replacements in-house, and they keep a stock of parts to do it.
Yeah, I got charged for another machines fix that was out of warranty, but it took absolutely no special work. There was no effort or drama attached to try to somehow convince them to deign to help me as you suggest. They had the part on hand, and charged me a reasonable fee for the replacement + work, and I picked the box up the next day. This was out of warranty, without AppleCare. It just cost me. Had they been out the part, it might have taken longer to get replaced-- but my experience says looking at a week as the *extreme* and not average is a reasonable expectation.
In short: I have never bought AppleCare, have had a few service needs, and only one wasn't what I'd call fast-- and it was five days (COUNTING a weekend in there, not five "business days" extending to seven or eight) and that was on a device solidly outside of their normal, expected maintenance window -- even under AppleCare.
I don't doubt it might not happen that some Apple user sometimes has a two week wait, but that is the exception and not the rule. I can get to Fry's and hope they have the part (they have /frequently/ been out of a particular one I've wanted... and I won't even talk about how often I've bought items from there which turned out defective or the service issues I've had with them as a result...) or I can make an appointment, go in, drop off my box, explain an issue, and 80% of the time, come back later that day or the next day, and its fixed.
That 80% is based on personal experience, YMMV.