On my route to work each morning, I go through a ~2 year old neighborhood for about a mile before I reach the turn-in for the office. The houses are built right along the Scioto river. The houses along the river have woods seperating them from the river (as well as steep banks). Most of the development's completed, but they are still building the last 10 or so houses and there's a handful of for-sale lots.
So I was driving down the road, ogling the $500 - $700k houses that maybe, someday, I'd be able to afford. When I noticed the car ahead of me just miss something rather large in the road. As I approached, I could see it was a turtle. I looked, no one oncoming, no one behind me, so I pulled over.
It was a rather large snapping turtle. I carefully picked it up on it's sides, towards the back, and started walking to the other side of the road where it was heading. At which point it let lose a torrent of, well, piss. Luckily, I was not wanting to get dirty (since I had my dilbert outfit on) and I didn't want to get bit, so I had it held out far from me. But most importantly, I had it pointing the opposite way. So it's jetison was no where near me.
I grumbled some explative about how unappreciative it was. Maybe something towards the idea of I should put it back down and let it be flattened. But I didn't, continued walking across the road. Went to put it down, and *swoosh* it let loose another torrent. Luckily this hit the mud that was on the other side of the curb where I was putting it down.
After it was down, I waited a second to see if it'd scoot away, but it was too alarmed to move. And I had to get to work, so I left.
Towards the end of that street, I noticed another large object on the opposite side, right on the curb. It was another turtle, looking to make the opposite journey the other had. I didn't stop. I hope he made it.
Looking back on it I should have pulled out my cellphone and taken a picture of the turtle. Tho not having handled all that many turtles in my life, this one seemed a pretty good size.