Assuming it's working properly.

My VW's system is supposed to do that, but because it doesn't sense the door unlocking or opening properly, the alarm stays armed, and you then get the alarm going off when you try to start the car.

And still the bloody Seppos saw fit to chuck it all in the river (the Hudson was it?) - Philistines!

If the Pagans had truly converted, they would no longer need or want to practice their old rituals. But continue to practice them they did, so the Catholic Church had to weave a tissue-thin veil of lies^H^H^^H^H dogma around these practices in order to claim conversion even when there was none. And it wasn't limited just to the annual festivals, such as Spring, Harvest or Midwinter. Even the greater beliefs such as the first two commandments were subject to pragmatic compromise by the Church.

The Old Gods became "Saints". Of course, there is only one God, but you can have as many Saints as you like. They can even have their own individual festival days and spheres of responsibility. But, we will not refer to them even as demi-gods! No, no, no! In this way, you could still make prayers, petitions and even offerings to them just as you could with the Old Gods (no dead animals, please). And all without violating the first commandment. Isn't that convenient? This had the wonderful side-effect that the old idols no longer represented Gods as such, so they became mere statues or "icons" and thus, the second commandment was also safe. After all, praying at my little shrine to Saint Snigglefritz was really just asking him to talk to the One True God on my behalf, as I am but a worm in His presence and thoroughly unworthy of direct contact with Him myself.

But it's not just Catholicism - All religions suck.

I think you just need to add a modern stack to your resume and put out an example project on github, you'll be ready to find work. The stacks that people are hiring for right now:

• Python -- tornado -- mysql / nosql (mongo or redis experience)
• Ruby -- Rails -- mysql / nosql
• Haskell/Erlang/Functional Insanity -- I have no idea how these people deal with data
• Javascript/ Nodejs -- mongo probably
• IOS Development

A solid web application based on bootstrap.js in any of the first four frameworks will get you an interview. A sample application for IOS should as well, at probably any one of your local agencies / design firms / app shops.

If I were in your shoes, I'd skip the big enterprise languages, like Java / C# -- if you like Perl, you're going to hate working in those languages, and much of the work in those languages sucks, to be honest.

My money-shot idea: learn kdb+ and q and go pull in $250k a year working for a hedge fund / investment bank. Also, it's fun and brain-bending.

Only if you cheat by putting the em-FAH-sis on the wrong syll-AH-ble.

In that case, I have to say that my favourite solution to the orange rhyming problem is Tom Lehrer's (even though it too, is a cheat).

Eating an orange
While making love
Makes for bizarre enj-
-oyment thereof

We don't celebrate hallowe'en in Australia, so most likely, they are gonna get nothing from us except a lecture. Most kids that I've seen doing the 31/10 doorknock 'round here are greedy little shits who are only in it for the goodies. They don't even dress up, so it's nothing more than door to door begging.

No costume, no candy! Now scram, kids...and get off my lawn!

<SIGH> Go and listen to Pink Floyd's "The Wall" again.

Keep the following in mind...

It's already too late. He died in 1983, but no-one had the heart to tell him.

Of course it would become the standard - just as low-altitude skydiving has become the standard manner of returning airplane passengers to the ground.

PROTIP: That whooshing sound you can hear is not made by Felix Baumgartner.