Oh come on, how ridiculous is that! Next thing you know we won't be able to say "porch monkey" any more. My grandmother used to call me a porch monkey all the time when I was a kid because I'd sit on the porch and stare at my neighbours. She was just an old timer, that's the way people talked back then! Didn't mean they were racist... Although my grandmother did refer to a broken beer bottle once as a nigger knife... You know, come to think of it, my grandmother was kind of a racist.

How can they tell the difference between a new unknown codeword and a typo? For that matter, is CLOUD SYNERGY a secret program or a marketing term?

(If you want to create the ultimate hiding-in-plain-view secret program, start it with the ACTION ITEM view controller driving ELEVATOR PITCH monitoring devices built on PARADIGM SHIFT technology with STRATEGIC ROLE functionality and optional COMPETITOR STRATEGY and BIG PICTURE modules, all tied together via CRITICAL PATH and CUSTOMER FOCUS software. 50% of people reading it will fall asleep and the other 50% will have their heads explode, while you can get on with recording everyone's phonecalls and figuring out how to get Congress to mandate video cameras in bedrooms).

I think the OP was referring to a queue of landsharks in suits lining up to sue.

In any case upgrading the OS on your Android phone is pretty straightforward, it's straight from the Jack Valenti school ("If you want to back up your DVD, you buy a second DVD"). In this case, when you want to upgrade the OS on your phone, you throw it away and buy a new one with the newer OS on it. This is so much simpler for consumers than that confusing process of applying updates and patches, I don't know why other vendors didn't think of this before.

How TF did this make the front page? It's a fscking on/off (well, off-only) switch done via USB. What's next, "Dell introduces amazing new kill switch on latest laptops, labelled 'Power'"?

Yup. Patch Tuesday is followed by Bluescreen Wednesday, "We're looking into it" Thursday, "We've been unable to replicate it here" Friday, "No wait a sec..." Saturday, and "We think we've identified an issue on some machines" Sunday. By removing that nice fixed timeline, users will have to record when each update is pushed out, wait a week or so for the third rev of the update that may actually resolve the issues to be released, and then manually install it. Ugh.

Organise a "draw Jesus sodomizing Mary" contest in Texas and you'll get crazy Christian jihadists doing the same thing. If you set up an event specifically designed to insult/offend/antagonise a particular religion, you're always going to get a response like this from someone.

I'm waiting to see if it's really religion-based or just another negotiating (shakedown) tactic. A few million here to promote native cultural issues, a few million there into the ÅOElelo HawaiÊi fund, another few million to the Office of Hawaiian Affairs, and suddenly the spirits agree with the telescope being built, and all is good. Such magic.

Did the voices tell you to say that?

No, I read it all right. Do you think the banks are just going to stand by and let him do that?

Yeah, the banks are going to allow this. And big pharma will make make medicine freely available for the good of all mankind, the music industry will distribute MP3s of all their artists for free over BitTorrent, and Microsoft will cede the desktop to Linux. Any minute now.

"This is a Windows Phone. Prime quality. Feel it! And I can promise you it is not the only one we have. In Russia we have ho hooo... dozens of Windows Phones. Dozens! But this is our company's most popular product of all. Blue Screen! Finest quality. Try. By lucky coincidence we have more than 800 billion tons of it."

It's pretty straightforward really, you take your iOS app, you throw away everything other than int main( int argc, char **argv ), and then you replace the rest of the code with the Windows 10 equivalent.

No, no, no, that's not true! I once met a guy who had a Windows phone and he said his wife had one too, so they've sold at least two pieces. There may even be a third Windows Phone user out there (although I've never met him/her/it).