Cat exists under Linux.
You can do that natively :

make a box :

if (( RANDOM % 2 )); then echo "Cat is dead">/tmp/Box; else echo "Cat is alive">/tmp/Box; fi

open the box :

cat /tmp/Box

I don't understand your single sentance

" 1 Mbps ought to be enough for anybody. "

Seriously, 120 kB/s stinks.

>> Me too. It's a hell of a lot harder to bug every man, woman, and child in the west than it is to intercept and crawl their communications

You don't need to do that.
You just put a worm or backdoor in all these peoples smartphones :)

>> bug every man, woman, and child in the west

The east attempted that before '89, didn't work so well

>> WTF happened to Office 365

It will be renamed "Office 362" when the statistics will show 3 days downtime per year :))))

Or perhaps "Office 363" on leap years :)

>> Clearly they don't expect much to come out of this research.

No, they don't expect mankind to head in a better direction for it to be worthwile to live longer.

Nope, unfortunately, a big chunk of NK laptops are under windows too

See here for a much better insight than the article :
http://media.ccc.de/browse/con...

>> "reduce manned launch costs by 95% and increase launch reliability by 500%".
Use soyuz.
Already done.

>> The only way to recover (other than pay the ransom) was to...yes...buy a Windows 8 install disk and reformat.

Or install linux :)

>> Two of the largest mining pools combined would have enough to say "NO!" to these guys forever.
That does not work.

Windows 8 desktops, are just irritatingly ugly and not practical to do your work on. Non-crisp looking misty Windows icons, hidden away in icons. If you work with a Windows 8 desktop, for more than a couple of years you will end up with bad eyesight. If you are determined to make the Windows 8 desktop, work then you will spend hours on it customising it to make it usable for a work environment. Once you have achieved that and get used to it you will be told you need to update, it to the latest version which will make it look ridiculous again it will drive you fucking mad! You will spend even more time trying to make it look like a work environment again to the point where you are so sick of it you won't upgrade and you end up not using it. They all want to be a smart phone OS on a desktop.

>> 8.1 is the best OS they have done
you must have been sleeping the last two years.

This is the only advice which will still be valid in 4 years :)

>>$800-$1200 price point are cheap garbage

Yep, motre or less.
But there's a trick : buy a used buisness laptop, 2 years old. Will cost 200 Euros, and will last 5 years more, inclusive battery
Lenovo or lifebooks are a good place to start.

you can also install a good linux distri, and have a windows VM for occasionnal use, when vwndors give you that shitty config utility that is win. only.
After 2-3 years, you can usually delete the windows VM, and free afew GB of HDD.