I have a lovely stapler at home.

Me:"Yes, I'd like a mars bar
Vendy:"Perhaps you should have a facial mask".
Me:"Why should I? My Mum says I'm a as handsome as a prince!"
Vendy:"All mothers say that, to avoid hurting your feelings ugly".
Me:*Bursts into tears*
Me:"Allright I'll take a facial mask, a razor, a box of tampons, and a coke"

"Galaxy X could soon lead to Galaxies Y and Z, according to Chakrabarti". Phew, at least there could only be three of 'em.

Using current technology I wonder how much storage a 24 inch platter would have.

That green I sunk in the corner pocket last week was a shot worthy of....eh? Oh a big lightbulb. Meh.

Hopefully they'll be able to prevent something similar from happening again barring another intense solar storm.

8 months-ish,that sounds about right for "I'll get around to it".

Isn't there a rule about not mixing your drinks. To prevent having the trots the day after, for example.

Back in 1999 or thereabouts on holiday I picked up a hat that had a solar panel on the top, and a fan in the brim that blew onto your face. I thought it was the epitome of personal solar technology. I guess it still is after looking at those pants.

When they've finished over here you'll be able to sign a petition on the Government website in a flash.

I did hit the return key a couple of times, preview was OK. Yes, the submitted looks naff.

My computer like a few came with MSO pre-installed. I didn't mind the initial legit check (I still have the licence key) and subsequent download of updates. It's when a few months later it asked, nay, demanded to check again. Later I opened a document and it asked again, and again, and again so on and so forth. An e-mail natter back and forth with someone whose spelling could be better at Microsoft help got me nowhere. "Have you entered the correct licence key?" "Have you un-installed and re-installed, then re-entered the licence key?" There must be something better I thought. So I gave Open Office a try. A free office program? It must be a bit naff, full of bugs I thought. Well I was surprised, I've had no problems with it and it covers all my needs. I haven't looked back since.

What did we use? Metric or imperial?

"Computer, *bleep* security lockout, authorisation,Sparky, charlie tango one five nine alpha."

All those years I played Tetris... oh wait, I worked in a warehouse.