That is a *very* long story. I could tell a similar one about my father. ... Doesn't matter.
Just briefly: There are hardly any things I can discuss with my father - who is a type-a evangelical christian faith man, a charlatan and a fraud who took the easy way out of his responsiblities and who had the nerve to try and borrow money from me on my 37th birthday, after having left me and my mother to our fate when I was twelve. And countless other things of the same bizar proportions too strange to actually be believable. ("I'm praying for you ..." ... Yeah, great. Thanks a bunch, asshole.)
Also there are also things I can simply not discuss with my mother. There are things she never will appreciate and there are acknowlegements I will never get from her, no matter what I do. To deeply engrained is her feminist hate of men because of those who wronged her ... or she thinks who wronged her. I love her and she did her best. She says she tried as hard as she could and I believe her. There is actually literally nothing more you can ask from a parent. In that regard I got very lucky.
The thing im getting to is this:
It's most certainly an evolutionary and biological constant that some people have good parents, some people have so-so parents and some people have parents who are way in over their head with the parenting business. Think of how many children would simply die out of neglect just a few centuries ago. It's just a few decades ago when 12-year olds where expected to work 14 hours a day for a plate of food. It still is in some places of the world.
What I'm saying is this: If your burden happens to be having parents who you simply can't look up to anymore in this day and age, as a grown adult, it is time to move on. It's hard and I catch myself falling into relapse every once in a while, but move on I should. I try to associate with people I admire and I try to cope with the fact that quite a few things I learned from my parents are flat out wrong or at least based on a bias.
I try every day to move on, and so should you.
Little Tip: I've taken on the habit of calling my mother and my father by their first name about 15 years ago. It helps.
I also try to be the best Pop in the world to my daughter, that's a good thing to focus on aswell. I think I'm doing fine. Not perfect, but fine.
My 2 cents.