It's not the kids fault, why make them suffer for their parents stupidity?

The 1920x1080 / 1366x768 resolution curse has been the worst thing to happen to laptops in a long time. That and glossy screens.

a series of images centered straight overhead starting shortly after sunset

It's not rising, it's already overhead.

I find this whole idea hard to swallow.

Hasn't this already happened?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunokhod_programme

I was one of those people on the beach. Stupid cloud :)

You don't realise how cheap the sondes are. There are hundreds launched every day, and they don't get them back. They have to be incredibly cheap and there are no GSM technologies cheaper than a simple FM radio.
There are technical limitations too - GSM only works up to about 5km, above that they will likely fail. Sondes usually fly to about 30km.